Sex can reap a host of benefits – from reducing stress levels to boosting your immune system. But with nearly a quarter of women and one in six men saying they are sexually inactive, not everyone is reaping these rewards. A-listers are speaking more candidly about abstaining, too. Just a few weeks ago, reality TV star Maura Higgins revealed that she has been celibate for a year and a half. Actress Julia Fox has also regularly discussed her decision to embrace celibacy, previously sharing that it has become a way for her to take back control. Clearly, we do not all need to be sexually active constantly to feel satisfied. There is no shame in taking a break — but what impact does it have on your body if you choose a prolonged dry spell?
What Does Sex Actually Mean?
Sex can be defined in whatever way works best for you. Dr Angela Wright, clinical sexologist at The Portland Hospital, explains: As a society, we tend to equate sex with penetration, but definitions of celibacy may mean that all sexual contact with a partner is being avoided. Equally, it may not mean a break from all sensuality or intimacy with a partner, or from our own solo sex habits. Being mindful and conscious about what kind of touch you want – and do not want, both within relationships and on your own, is an important part of defining and holding your physical and emotional boundaries.
Improved Emotional Wellbeing
First, celibacy can bring about a positive new era of personal growth. Annabelle Knight, psychosexual therapist and Lovehoney sex and relationships expert, is a big advocate for these emotional benefits. She tells Metro: Celibacy can give you the space to reconnect with your body and your boundaries, and to understand what you actually want from intimacy. For many people, it is a time of rediscovery — focusing on self-care, confidence, and pleasure in other forms, from solo exploration to emotional connection. Everyone's needs and timelines are different, and periods of celibacy can be really positive for some people.
Vaginal Dryness
It is not all roses, though. Dr Bhavini Shah from LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor tells Metro that women can experience vaginal dryness tied to abstaining from intimacy, which can make penetration more uncomfortable if and when they return to sex after some time away. This can lead to a condition known as dyspareunia, where women feel pain just before, during, or after sex, Dr Bhavini explains. She adds that dyspareunia can also be caused by several other conditions, from hormonal changes and menopause to infections from STIs and UTIs.
Spontaneous Erections
Spontaneous or nocturnal erections are completely normal, and they happen whether you are sexually active or not, says Annabelle. They are your body's natural maintenance system, keeping blood flow healthy and tissue responsive. During celibacy, they can actually be a reassuring sign that everything is functioning as it should. They are not necessarily linked to sexual frustration or unmet desire; they are just a physiological process, much like stretching your muscles after a long day. Men may find that spontaneous erections occur less frequently due to a reduction in sexual activity, but she adds: These effects are temporary and can return once sexual activity resumes.
Changes in Your Libido
You might assume that if you have not had sex for a while, you will be horny all the time. But actually, the opposite can be true. You might notice a lower libido if you are not sexually active, or you may find your desire fluctuates in waves, says Annabelle. She explains that the act of having sex is not what kickstarts or satisfies your libido. Factors like mood, body image, relationship satisfaction, and even how safe or relaxed you feel can impact your libido levels – often more than the last time you had sex. For some people, periods of celibacy can actually bring greater awareness of what triggers or suppresses their desire, because they are tuning into those emotional and physical cues more consciously, Annabelle continues. You could be celibate for years and still feel sudden surges of desire because your brain and body are wired to respond to stimulation, fantasy, and emotional cues.
Giving Your Immune System a Break
While the same can be true of having frequent sex, taking a break from it can also give your immune system a breather. As psychosexual and relationship psychotherapist Silva Neves previously told Metro, sex is thought to boost our immune system, referencing one study which showed that people who had more frequent sex had more immunoglobulin, a blood protein that forms part of the immune system. He further explained: We also know that for men, a higher frequency of ejaculation reduces the risk of prostate cancer and having sex helps lower blood pressure, so is good for the heart. But when the tables are turned, Annabelle says that without the regular exposure to partnered sex, your body has more chance to recover and stay healthy. This is because taking a pause from sex allows your body and mind to rebalance, which in turn can lower stimulation levels, support deeper rest, and free up mental and emotional energy that can be redirected elsewhere. Annabelle likens it to a simple reset that can leave you feeling more focused and refreshed overall. On top of that, giving yourself this break can boost your energy, improve sleep quality, and make it easier to focus on other parts of your life, from work to hobbies.
