Professor Green, 42, has spoken about the trauma of losing his father and how becoming a parent himself forced him to confront his emotions. The rapper is supporting a Movember campaign to increase statutory paternity leave for new fathers, arguing that the current 10-day entitlement is insufficient for building strong bonds.
A Personal Journey Through Grief
The musician, whose real name is Stephen Manderson, lost his father Peter to suicide in 2008 when he was 43. He explored this tragedy in a 2015 BBC documentary, but admits that understanding the reasons behind his father's death didn't translate into emotional healing until he had his own son, Slimane, now five.
"It was having a kid and being around my child that taught me to learn to sit with my feelings, versus just to act them out," he told the Mirror.
The Turning Point
Green explained that while his documentary concluded that the difference between those who take their own life and those who don't is the ability to tolerate feelings, he failed to internalize that lesson. "I said that, but it was entirely cerebral - it wasn't integrated. I left and carried on being reactive - acting out my feelings."
The turning point came when his son began having tantrums. "If I do that, I'm not setting an example of what he's feeling being tolerable. That just tells him: whatever you're feeling will never be tolerable, because the adults you're learning from can't tolerate their feelings."
Campaigning for Change
Green believes the current paternity leave of 10 days is woefully inadequate. "It was only the time that I had with him, and being available, being open and having that time that allowed me to learn that."
He argues that insufficient leave reinforces outdated stereotypes. "As a man, historically and more stereotypically, we've gone through detachment. It feeds into that age-old stereotype of a dad on the weekends who doesn't know his head from his arse. It's not fair and it's not healthy."
Reality TV and Fatherhood
The rapper, who was diagnosed with autism and ADHD in his thirties, recently appeared on Celebs Go Dating, where he discussed his struggles with leading by example as a father. The show received praise from viewers who related to his honesty.
Green revealed he previously turned down I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here at the peak of his music career, but now feels differently about reality TV. "When I was asked to do I'm a Celeb... reality TV still had a really weird vibe around it. Whereas now, maybe it's the age I'm at, maybe it's just the change in landscape."
The Dad Shift Campaign
On Monday, celebrities including footballer Troy Deeney and rugby star Ugo Monye joined politicians for five-a-side football games lasting 10 minutes to represent the current paternity leave entitlement. Movember and The Dad Shift have jointly published 'Extra Time With Dad: Improving Men's Health through UK Paternity Leave', highlighting that UK fathers get just two weeks' leave paid at £194.32 per week - less than half the minimum wage and the worst offer in Europe, where the average is eight weeks.
Green hopes the campaign will help other fathers avoid the resentment that can arise from unequal parenting responsibilities. "It doesn't decide on the outcome of a relationship, but I'm sure there's a lot of positive impact on relationships where people have been able to share responsibility."
