The death of Australian radio icon John Laws has prompted an outpouring of tributes from colleagues and politicians, but one voice has starkly broken from the chorus of praise. Melbourne media figure Derryn Hinch has penned a remarkably candid and insult-filled final send-off to his old Sydney rival, refusing to sanitise their deeply fractious relationship.
A Legacy Divided: Praise Versus Criticism
Since John Laws died at age 90 nearly two weeks ago, many of his former Sydney colleagues have lionised the man with the 'golden tonsils' for his monumental 71-year career. Fellow broadcasters Ray Hadley called Laws a 'radio icon', while Kyle Sandilands said he felt 'like I've lost a grandfather'. Ben Fordham declared that 'radio has lost its king', and Alan Jones hailed Laws' morning program as 'compulsive listening'. Prime Minister Anthony Albanese, along with former prime ministers Paul Keating and John Howard, offered glowing tributes, culminating in a state funeral held on Wednesday.
However, Derryn Hinch, the 81-year-old who hosted radio shows on Melbourne stations 3XY, 3AW and 3AK, as well as national television programs, made it unequivocally clear he was never an admirer. 'Radio legend John Laws, who died this week, and I were not friends,' Hinch wrote online. 'Far from it.'
The Root of the Rivalry: Scandals and Insults
Hinch immediately raised the spectre of the Australian Broadcasting Authority's 1999 'cash for comment' inquiry, which revealed that Laws and Alan Jones had received undeclared payments from major corporations in exchange for favourable on-air commentary. 'During the "cash for comment" scandal I said Laws and Alan Jones should be banned for ten years for damage to the industry,' Hinch stated. Laws had consistently denied any wrongdoing, positioning himself as a salesman and entertainer rather than a journalist, famously endorsing products like Valvoline motor oil and Mortein fly spray.
The animosity between the two media personalities stretched back decades. Hinch recalled that their relationship 'was not helped' when, as editor of The Sun in Sydney in the mid-1970s, he approved the headline 'The Pockmarked Prince of Pain' for a column written by Mike Gibson. 'I also said once that I wished he would turn his Mortein can around and spray it in the other direction,' he added.
A Final Confrontation and an Ironic Reconciliation
Hinch detailed his most notorious encounter with Laws, which occurred just three days after the Sydney broadcaster's retirement from 2UE in December 2007. While Laws was hosting a lunch for his staff at his favourite Woolloomooloo restaurant, Hinch and legendary presenter Bob Rogers were dining nearby. 'With a couple of drinks under his belt he swaggered up and publicly insulted us,' Hinch said of Laws. 'He loudly called us both despicable c***s.'
At the time, Hinch had publicly revealed he was suffering from advanced cirrhosis of the liver caused by chronic alcohol abuse. 'Laws described me as a "failed alcoholic",' Hinch remembered. 'I said that would make him a successful one.' Laws later gave his version of events to the Daily Telegraph, claiming he told Hinch he 'looked like an armpit transplant'. Bob Rogers, then 81, found the whole altercation wonderfully entertaining, remarking it was the most enjoyable lunch he'd had in years.
In a final, ironic twist, Hinch recalled their last meeting. 'Ironically, I was in a Sydney restaurant last Christmas and bumped into Laws who was sitting in a wheelchair with a minder,' he said. 'I'm not sure he recognised me but, in the Xmas spirit, we shook hands. First time ever.' This final handshake marked the end of one of Australian media's most enduring and acrimonious rivalries.
