A new Bollywood-inspired musical adaptation of Charles Dickens' classic A Christmas Carol has been met with universal critical condemnation, with reviewers describing Christmas Karma as potentially the worst Christmas film ever made.
A Festive Catastrophe Unfolds
Christmas Karma, rated PG with a 118-minute runtime, has achieved the remarkable feat of emptying cinemas faster than an outbreak of dysentery according to critics. The film represents such a dramatic departure from Dickens' original 1843 story that one reviewer suggested listeners near Westminster Abbey might hear the author spinning in his grave.
The modern-day London-set adaptation features an all-star cast including Danny Dyer as a singing cabbie, Hugh Bonneville as Jacob Marley, and Boy George taking on the role of the Ghost of Christmas Future. Despite this impressive lineup, the film has failed to deliver anything approaching quality entertainment.
Critical Massacre Across the Board
Critics have been unanimous in their disdain for Christmas Karma. One reviewer was so shocked by the film's awfulness that they attended two separate screenings - first with fellow critics in London, then again at the Odeon in Hereford - to confirm their initial negative assessment.
The Telegraph awarded the film no stars whatsoever, suggesting it ranked among the worst things to happen to Christmas since King Herod. The Guardian described it as leaden, unconvincingly acted, and about as welcome as a dead rat in the eggnog.
Audience reactions mirrored critical opinion. During one screening, the reviewer counted seven people at the start of the film but only three remained by the blessed end, suggesting the cinematic experience proved too much for most viewers to endure.
What Went Wrong With This Festive Offering?
Christmas Karma reimagines Ebenezer Scrooge as Eshaan Sood, played by Kunal Nayyar of The Big Bang Theory fame. Sood is a first-generation Indian immigrant and mean-spirited founder of financial services company Marley & Sood, who treats his employees and everyone else with contempt.
The film attempts to explore themes of immigration and assimilation through Sood's backstory as one of more than 28,000 Ugandan Asians who arrived in Britain after being expelled by President Idi Amin in 1972. However, critics argue these potentially profound elements are lost amid numerous creative misjudgments.
Among the most baffling casting decisions was Eva Longoria as the Ghost of Christmas Past, inexplicably portrayed as a Mexican spirit from the Day of the Dead. Boy George appears similarly uncomfortable as the Ghost of Christmas Future, looking faintly perplexed in his tattered black robe.
Hugh Bonneville's Jacob Marley appears through exceedingly weird CGI, while Broadway star Billy Porter's Ghost of Christmas Present sports a lavish green gown and matching eyeshadow that one critic described as nightmare-inducing.
The film struggles to reconcile its Hindu protagonist who doesn't celebrate Christmas with the traditional Christmas Carol narrative. Early scenes feature Danny Dyer bursting into a painfully weak title song while driving his black cab, with lyrics that fail to impress.
A Festive Failure For The Ages
Despite being directed by Gurinder Chadha, who previously found success with the charming 2002 film Bend It Like Beckham, Christmas Karma appears destined for cinematic infamy. Producers including Trudie Styler, who also cameos as a charity collector, likely expected better results from what initially seemed an interesting concept.
Even basic details come under criticism - the apparently impoverished Cratchit family live in a multi-coloured Notting Hill house that would cost millions, while no self-respecting miser like Mr Sood would choose expensive black cabs over cheaper Uber alternatives.
With its mid-November release date, critics suggest Christmas Karma might be forgotten by the time the proper festive season arrives. However, they also predict it will achieve immortality alongside 1964's Santa Claus Conquers the Martians as one of the worst Christmas films ever made.
For those seeking a superior adaptation of Dickens' classic, reviewers unanimously recommend 1992's The Muppet Christmas Carol, which they describe as superior to this nonsense by a factor of several thousand.
