Rose Stokes, a 38-year-old mother from Bath, Somerset, endured a harrowing period of relentless weakness, overwhelming exhaustion, and severe hair loss that left her questioning her ability to parent her two young children and straining her marriage. The constant symptoms, which she initially attributed to depression or postpartum weight gain, spiraled into a "shame-filled" experience as doctors repeatedly dismissed her concerns, suggesting her struggles were simply to be expected with small children.
A Mother's Silent Struggle
Ms Stokes recounted numerous tearful episodes and feeling "gaslighted" into believing her condition wasn't as severe as it truly was. After multiple appointments filled with what she describes as "back and forth gaslighting," she finally received a diagnosis: an iron deficiency. While this condition affects approximately 8 percent of women in the UK, according to the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, it often goes untreated, leading to prolonged suffering.
The Vital Role of Iron
Iron is crucial for transporting oxygen throughout the body, maintaining a healthy immune system, and reducing the risk of heart and lung conditions. Without adequate iron, the body cannot produce enough healthy red blood cells, causing cells, tissues, and organs to function suboptimally. Severe deficiency can trigger anaemia, a potentially fatal condition if left unaddressed.
The NHS recommends that men aged 19 to 50 consume 8.7 milligrams of iron daily, while women in the same age bracket require 14.8 milligrams. Iron also plays a key role in immune system development, making those with low iron status more susceptible to infections.
Symptoms and Misdiagnosis
Ms Stokes experienced no issues during her first pregnancy or after giving birth. However, while pregnant with her second child, she suffered frequent dizzy spells, which she mistakenly assumed were typical pregnancy symptoms. After giving birth in July 2024, her condition deteriorated dramatically, with hair falling out in clumps and exhaustion persisting even after a full night's rest.
Additional symptoms included breathlessness when climbing stairs, a sore tongue covered with ulcers, and forgetfulness. In a desperate attempt to cope, Ms Stokes pushed herself to the limit, often ending up bed-bound due to sheer lack of energy. She eventually withdrew from social activities, unable to spend quality time with friends, family, or her husband.
The Emotional Toll
"It affected my self-worth hugely because I thought I was failing at motherhood some days," Ms Stokes revealed. "My partner got used to me being dizzy, tired, and anxious all the time. I kept routinely blocking the drains with my hair, but it was the least of my problems. I didn't have it in me to care."
Diagnosis and Treatment
In June 2025, Ms Stokes insisted that doctors investigate further, leading to a diagnosis of low ferritin, a protein that stores iron. She described the diagnosis as "validating" and was initially prescribed iron tablets. However, the side effects proved severe, prompting a switch to an iron infusion administered in hospital.
"I think as women we often blame ourselves before we look outward," Ms Stokes reflected. "I assumed I was weak or that I wasn't coping as well as I should have been with having two young kids. It's hard even without an iron deficiency. Now I have been treated, I know there is a drastic difference."
Iron-Rich Foods to Consider
To maintain healthy iron levels, incorporating iron-rich foods into one's diet is essential. Examples include:
- 100g grilled fillet steak (2.6mg)
- 100g calf liver (6.5mg)
- 100g mussels (6.8mg)
- 80g kale (1.2mg)
- 30g dried figs (0.7mg)
- 80g soya beans (2.8mg)
- 40g oats (1.9mg)
- 150g cooked quinoa (2.1mg)
- 100g tofu (5.4mg)
- 2 eggs (1.2mg)
- 50g Brazil nuts (1.2mg)
- ½ can chickpeas (3.4mg)
- 2 tsp curry powder (0.9mg)
- 2 tsp dried oregano (2.3mg)
- 30g fortified breakfast cereals (2.4mg)
A Message of Hope and Awareness
Ms Stokes now feels "like me again," able to perform daily tasks and be a better parent and partner. She emphasizes the importance of eating iron-rich foods, such as red meat, and urges others to persist in seeking medical answers if something feels amiss.
"If you feel like something isn't right, keep pushing for answers," she advised. "I'm always banging on about this and happy to help so it doesn't get ignored."
Studies indicate that 36 percent of UK women of child-bearing age may be iron-deficient, yet only one in four receives a formal diagnosis. Iron is an essential mineral vital for energy, cognitive function, digestion, and immunity. While most people obtain sufficient iron from foods like meat and leafy greens, heavy menstrual periods can quickly deplete iron stores, underscoring the need for greater awareness and proactive healthcare.
