A very public celebrity spat has erupted, with Hilary Duff's husband, Matthew Koma, launching a thinly-veiled attack on actress Ashley Tisdale, branding her 'self-obsessed' and 'tone deaf'. The drama stems from an essay Tisdale penned about leaving a 'toxic' mothers' group, which reportedly included Duff, Mandy Moore, and Meghan Trainor.
The Spark: A Scathing Essay and a Sarcastic Retort
The controversy began on Monday, 5 January 2026, when Ashley Tisdale published a personal essay in The Cut. In it, the High School Musical star detailed her experience in a Los Angeles-based celebrity mom group, describing a dynamic that turned into 'mean girl behaviour' and left her feeling excluded and isolated.
While Tisdale did not name the other members, she had been publicly linked to a group featuring Hilary Duff, Mandy Moore, and Meghan Trainor since around 2021. The group, once described by Moore as a 'cool mom club' formed by Duff, was seen as a supportive village for the new mothers.
The very next day, Tuesday 6 January, Matthew Koma responded in defence of his wife. The 38-year-old musician posted a spoof magazine cover on his Instagram featuring himself, with the headline: 'A mom group tell all through a father’s eyes: When You’re the Most Self-Obsessed Tone Deaf Person on Earth, Other Moms Tend to Shift Focus To Their Actual Toddlers.' He sarcastically captioned it: 'Read my new interview with @thecut.'
Tisdale's Claims of Exclusion and 'Toxic' Dynamics
In her essay, Tisdale, who shares two children with husband Christopher French, recalled the initial joy of finding her 'village' after her daughter Jupiter's birth in 2021. However, she claimed the atmosphere soured, alleging she was 'frozen out of the group' and deliberately excluded from gatherings.
'I remember being left out of a couple of group hangs, and I knew about them because Instagram made sure it fed me every single photo and Instagram Story,' she wrote. She described a painful dinner party where she was 'sat at the end of the table, far from the rest of the women.'
When she confronted the group about her feelings, Tisdale stated one person sent flowers but then ignored her message of thanks, deepening the sense of alienation. Past Instagram posts from 2022 showed members of the group, excluding a pregnant Mandy Moore, on a resort trip together, captioned by Trainor: 'I have mom friends and I love them.'
Fallout and Further Criticism
Following the essay's publication and Koma's retort, a representative for Tisdale told TMZ that her piece was not about her friendship with Moore, Duff, and Trainor. They insisted the essay was a broader commentary on issues mothers face, based on her personal experience with a different set of friends.
Nevertheless, the public airing of private grievances has drawn criticism from others. Television host Jenna Bush Hager questioned Tisdale's decision to handle the conflict so publicly. Speaking on her show Today with Jenna & Friends on Tuesday 6 January, Hager acknowledged the pain of feeling left out but suggested private conversations are more important.
'Speaking your truth to the people who have hurt you should be enough,' Hager said. 'I hope we can also teach that if you feel wronged, if you feel hurt, show love.'
The incident highlights how social media and public platforms can amplify personal disputes, turning private motherhood struggles into a very public spectacle for the entertainment world and its observers.
