Donald Trump kicked Keir Starmer while he was down and had a wild on-camera meltdown about his reflecting pool fiasco during a furious day in Washington. As the first round of Iran talks wound down, those in Switzerland were cautiously optimistic of reaching a final agreement within the 60-day deadline, but Trump spent more time blustering about alternatives. Meanwhile, a new book by the New York Times' Maggie Haberman and Jonathan Swan revealed a previously unknown personal service Trump offered Starmer in the White House. The White House also thought it'd be hilarious to theme their 'quantum computing' PR day around QAnon.
Trump Kicks Starmer While He's Down
Once renowned throughout Europe as the "Trump Whisperer," Keir Starmer was occasionally deployed to eke out concessions on issues like Ukraine that no other European leader could secure. They managed to stay cordial and chatty, but Trump's promises were only good until someone else got him on the phone. Asked about Starmer's departure at an Oval Office event last night, Trump said: "I wish him well, but he's got two problems energy and immigration and crime." Discussing the Iran war, Trump seethed: "Starmer wasn't there - and you know what? The people of the UK did not like it that he wasn't there. Starmer said no. Starmer said worse than no. He said 'we'll be there as soon as you win.' I said 'we don't need you as soon as we win. Before I went in we called him. He said 'oh wow...we'll be there.' - this was not Winston Churchill, that I can tell you. But Starmer said we'll be there as soon as we win."
There are a number of things in those few sentences which are untrue - not least Trump's suggestion that the US "won" the Iran war. But the most egregious falsehood is that people in the UK were anything but overjoyed that Starmer didn't follow Trump into such an illegal, baffling misadventure. The UK holding back polled incredibly well among British voters, and it was listed as the single issue voters thought Starmer had handled the best.
Trump Offered Starmer a Personal Service from One of His Aides
There is exactly one cute anecdote about Keir Starmer to be found within Maggie Haberman and Jonathan Swan's new book, Regime Change. In Chapter 17, the book mentions that Trump's longtime aide and personal valet, Walt Nauta, carries around "not just the usual personal items - makeup, hairspray, Tic Tacs - but also scissors so that Trump could snip his hair when he found that it was getting too long in the back, poking over his collar." It adds: "Nauta would also have a steamer nearby to iron out the creases in the President's suit as Trump stood before him. The President had once offered Nauta's steaming services to British Prime Minister Keir Starmer."
White House Sells 'Quantum' with QAnon Trappings
The White House had a string of announcements on quantum computing today, which absolutely nobody paid any attention to - partially because while he was supposed to be talking about it, he kept talking about Iran and the Lincoln reflecting pool. Someone in the White House's communications shop cleverly noticed that the word 'quantum' begins with the letter Q, as does QAnon, the baseless, far-right conspiracy theory movement. QAnon has prompted acts of domestic terrorism, broken countless families, and helped Donald Trump sweep to power twice. The White House Twitter account has been making funny jokes all day pretending to be releasing "Q drops," but actually releasing information about the administration's quantum computing strategy. It has been terribly tone deaf.
The Gash in Trump's Reflecting Pool Keeps Getting Longer
Trump is so desperate for it not to appear that his hand-picked contractors - and by extension he, himself - is to blame for the rapid disintegration of the floor of the Lincoln reflecting pool that he's doubling and tripling down on his insistence that it's the work of vandals. "No no," he said. "We had vandalism. They went in there with a knife." But asked how they would have got away with that, given there are National Guard and police patrolling the area 24 hours a day, he didn't have a super good answer. Asked if he had photos or videos as evidence, Trump said: "Well, let's put it this way, when you have a 350 - I think it's 350, not 250, 350 foot slit from one end to the other, you think that's proof?"
First of all, that's an increase of 100ft on the length he claimed yesterday. Second, I went there yesterday and looked for the slit. There is no slit. It does not exist. Trump went on: "Just go and see the parks department, they'll show it to you." They'll have a job, because it doesn't exist. "I saw it," he lied - he hasn't been to the reflecting pool since it reopened. The closest he's been is flying over it on Marine One yesterday, while I was there. Again, there is no slit. "They cut it. They cut it very violently and then they lifted it. They pulled it. It is what it is."
No it's not, Mr President. But while we're on the subject, you know what substance is neither vulnerable to box cutters or peeling? Granite. "Somebody said fertiliser in the water," Trump posited as a potential cause of the green that wouldn't be his fault. "You put fertiliser in the water, you get algae...they did something to create the algae. But that doesn't matter, it's been purified. It's dead."
The Duck Death Toll Has Sadly Risen
Speaking of things that have died - overnight the duck death toll in the reflecting pool has risen from one to three. DC animal rescue group City Wildlife has collected the bodies and taken them away for post-mortem examination.
Seriously Though, He's Really Mad About the Reflecting Pool
Trump was also asked why nobody's talking about the fact that the shoddy job of work done at the reflecting pool overran by four weeks and cost about ten times what he promised. He didn't answer, and just waffled something about Barack Obama's project to clean up the pool. "I spent less than two months on the reflecting pool and I have a better product," Trump lied. "I can't help it if somebody goes in with a knife and starts hacking it up. We also have pictures of it." Asked if the administration would release the alleged pictures, Trump said: "You'll see it in court." Bookmark this. I hereby predict we will never see the "pictures."
He Threatened ABC Again... This Time About the Pool
Later, Trump threatened ABC News over their coverage of the reflecting pool debacle, which from what I've seen has been factual and fair. He said they "failed to report that their close 'friends,' Dumocrats Obama and Biden, spent over 100 Million Dollars on the Reflecting Pool, and it never worked. In fact, it was rarely open due to leaks and 'stench.'" This is untrue. The Obama administration spent about two years renovating the pool, plugging leaks and repairing its filtration system. It was also re-engineered with a circulation and filtration system that uses water from the nearby tidal basin rather than city drinking water. It was also made slightly shallower to save water, and the bottom was tinted a slightly darker colour to better reflect the Washington Monument. All of which was accomplished without spraying blue rubber on anything. That project cost $34 million - not $100 million. And while the leak-fixing was not entirely successful, the pool has been open pretty much constantly since then. A project to more extensively refurbish the pool, replacing the granite at the bottom, had been in the planning for some time at an estimated cost of $100 million - or according to Trump when he set out on this little adventure, $301 million. The project did not progress during the Biden administration, presumably because of the cost.
