In a deeply personal and moving segment on Tuesday's edition of Loose Women, actress Lisa Riley bravely discussed her long and painful struggle with infertility. The 49-year-old, renowned for her role as Mandy Dingle in the ITV soap Emmerdale, joined guest panellists Kaye Adams, Janet Street-Porter, and Oti Mabuse for an open conversation that touched on contraception, career choices, and the profound desire for motherhood.
A Candid Conversation Sparked by Current Affairs
The discussion was prompted by Kaye Adams revealing recent reports that abortions have reached a record high in England and Wales. This led the panel to explore broader themes surrounding reproductive health and personal choice. It was within this context that Lisa Riley felt compelled to share her own story, offering viewers a raw glimpse into her private battles.
Religious Upbringing and Personal Choices
Lisa explained how her Catholic upbringing had a lasting impact, with teachings against contraception and sex before marriage deeply ingrained in her psyche. "That was in my head a lot," she confessed. She then described how her career ambitions took precedence during her younger years, a time before modern fertility tracking apps were available. "I did choose my career," she stated, reflecting on the different paths life can take.
She spoke fondly of finding the right partner in Al, whom she has been with since 2014. However, when the couple decided the time was right to try for a family, they faced heartbreaking obstacles. "When it came to the time of trying, I couldn't fall pregnant," Lisa revealed. "I would have given everything in my life to have had a child."
The Emotional Toll of IVF Treatment
The actress described undergoing extensive fertility treatments in her quest to conceive. She recalled the moment her partner, Al, intervened out of concern for her wellbeing. "He literally said, 'You have to stop all the IVF treatment because it's diminishing you, it's taking your personality away, you're trying too hard'," Lisa recounted. This intervention led her to a painful acceptance. "Sometimes in life, it's not meant to be. I have to sit with you girls here today knowing that."
She poignantly described the feeling of incompleteness she experienced. "I felt like a jigsaw with a missing piece," she said, a metaphor that powerfully conveyed her sense of loss. When asked by Janet Street-Porter if she felt "diminished" by the experience, Lisa affirmed, "Yeah I did, I felt really diminished." She admitted that even now, certain conversations at work can be a struggle.
Finding Happiness and a New Family Dynamic
Despite the sorrow, Lisa emphasised that she has found happiness and a fulfilling family life in a different form. She spoke with joy about her nephew and niece, who she says are now her "jigsaw." "I am very lucky, because I am a family unit," she affirmed, highlighting the different shapes a family can take.
When Kaye Adams asked if she is happy now, Lisa gave a thoughtful response. "Yeah I am happy, but also, I have to be happy," she said, acknowledging the conscious effort it sometimes requires. She expressed genuine delight for her pregnant friends at Emmerdale, but conceded that a small, lingering sadness remains. "There is always going to be that little, little scuff in the back of my head going 'It didn't quite work out for me', and I have to find peace in that." She credited her partner Al as her crucial source of support through this journey.
Parallel Perspectives on Career and Motherhood
The conversation also featured Janet Street-Porter's perspective as someone who consciously chose a career over having children. Janet explained that in her early career, having a child was simply what was expected. "It was completely expected that you do it," she said. She described being "utterly focused on being successful" and on her career, which involved extensive travel for work.
Kaye Adams posed the question to the panel: "Did you feel it was a choice - child or career?" While Lisa nodded in agreement, Janet was unequivocal. "Yeah it is, really. It was then," she stated, reflecting on the different pressures and expectations faced by women of her generation.
The episode provided a powerful platform for discussing women's health, personal choice, and the complex emotions surrounding fertility. Loose Women airs weekdays from 12:30pm on ITV1 and is available to stream on ITVX.
