In a deeply emotional and raw moment on television, reality star Jessi Ngatikaura revealed she was raped as a teenager. The disclosure came during the season three reunion special of the show Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, which aired on Hulu.
A Triggered Memory in Therapy
The 33-year-old participant shared that she uncovered the memory of being assaulted at age 19 while undergoing therapy. This therapeutic work was initiated after she and her husband, Jordan Ngatikaura, sought professional help for their marital struggles, which have been a central storyline this season.
Jessi began to break down in tears while discussing the topic with her castmates. Her emotional revelation was prompted as she listened to co-star Mikayla Matthews speak about her own history of childhood sexual abuse, a story Mikayla had first shared in a previous season.
Impact on Relationships and Intimacy
Jessi explained to the group how this repressed trauma has profoundly affected her life and marriage. She linked the memory to a pattern of emotional numbness, pushing people away, and feeling 'not good enough'. Furthermore, she admitted it has created significant intimacy issues with her husband.
'I don't want him to touch me, and it's not his fault,' Jessi stated candidly. 'But it's so crazy how your body reacts. It's not just your emotions.'
She clarified that while she and Jordan had existing marital problems, the emergence of this traumatic memory had exacerbated them. The couple had briefly separated but reconciled after three months, committing to couples' therapy.
A Cast United by Shared Trauma
The reunion highlighted how several cast members have experienced sexual abuse. Conner Leavitt, who had previously opened up about being raped as a child, became teary-eyed as Jessi spoke. He expressed his sympathy and related his own struggles with intimacy, describing a pendulum swing between aversion and hypersexuality as a coping mechanism.
Jessi directly addressed Mikayla, saying, 'I know exactly how you feel.' She added that watching Mikayla's story unfold on screen provided 'another layer of healing' and made her feel deeply understood.
Mikayla reflected on her decision to share her story publicly, stating she believed the difficult conversations were 'helping so many people that are watching.'
The full Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season three reunion, featuring this powerful discussion, is available to stream on Hulu.
If you or someone you know has been affected by sexual assault, support is available. You can text STRENGTH to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to connect with a certified crisis counsellor.
