Daily Star agony aunt Jane O'Gorman offers straight-talking advice to readers facing relationship troubles, from secret affairs to intrusive partners. Her guidance aims to help people set boundaries and regain self-respect.
Breaking a Toxic Affair
A male reader wrote that he enjoys regular sex with his married neighbour, but she ignores him in public. He is in love with her, yet she only acknowledges him when she wants intimacy. She pushes him onto the bed whenever he tries to discuss their situation.
Jane advises him to lock his back door and end the cycle. She says he should focus on other friends and activities to escape her influence. She reminds him that he deserves respect and should find someone who appreciates him.
Setting Boundaries in Play Fighting
Another reader complained that his girlfriend likes to play fight before sex but often hurts him. She recently knocked out one of his dental crowns accidentally. He fears being seen as weak but dreads these encounters.
Jane recommends discussing boundaries away from the bedroom. She suggests asking whether his girlfriend enjoys hurting him and whether she needs a more compatible partner. She stresses that fun should stop when someone gets hurt.
Dealing with a Mysterious Partner
A third reader described his girlfriend as tricky and untrustworthy after a year of dating. She is vague about her job, finances, and past, and frequently disappears for days. She once rifled through his filing cabinet, claiming she was looking for her passport.
Jane urges him to trust his instincts and confront her about her behaviour. She says she crossed a line by breaking into his cabinet. If she remains evasive, he should consider whether the relationship can continue on an honest footing.
Managing a Co-Parenting Rivalry
Finally, a reader wrote about her ex-partner's new girlfriend, who is obsessed with her. The woman stared at her throughout a party for the reader's eldest child. The ex says the new partner is nervous, but the reader finds it insulting.
Jane suggests the ex should address the odd behaviour. She recommends meeting the new partner for coffee to clear the air. She reminds the reader that the children's wellbeing is what matters most.
