Countless films and TV shows, such as Gilmore Girls and Ginny and Georgia, depict parents treating their children as best friends. However, experts warn that these relationships may cross a line when children end up carrying adult responsibilities.
Jenna Ryu, a former wellness reporter with a B.A. in psychology and journalism, explains that this dynamic is known as 'parentification'—a role reversal where a child is forced to take on adult-like responsibilities from an early age. This can include acting as a parent's therapist, cheerleader, or family peacemaker, or managing financial tasks like paying bills.
Clinical psychologist Robyn Koslowitz clarifies that parentification is not about sharing clothes or going to the nail salon together, but rather when the child starts serving the needs of the adult. While closeness and even a sense of friendship are okay, children should not be expected to be an adult's main source of comfort.
According to Psychology Today, emotional parentification may stem from parents who never learned to handle their feelings, were themselves parentified, or suffer from addiction or mental illness. It can involve a child mediating between family members, acting as a therapist, or being privy to adult problems like dating struggles or financial woes.
Experts emphasise that healing from parentification is possible, often through therapy and establishing firm boundaries. Web MD advises that prioritising yourself, your needs, and your mental health is essential, especially as you grow into adulthood.
