A new survey has revealed that the casual British greeting 'mate' is a significant source of irritation for people over 50, with many viewing its use by strangers as bad manners.
Survey Exposes Widespread Annoyance
Boom Radio, a station catering to the post-war baby boomer generation, polled 2,600 listeners aged between 50 and 90. The results were clear: two-thirds of men and three-quarters of women believe it is impolite to call someone 'mate' if you have never met them. The irritation is particularly acute among women.
David Lloyd, co-founder of Boom Radio, commented on the findings. "Most boomers welcome a friendly interaction with a stranger," he said, "but we can get peeved if it's deemed to be patronising or misjudged." He illustrated the nuance, noting that "A barman addressing us as 'mate' is one thing, but coming from a police officer or a call centre operator doesn't rest so easily for many older folk."
Professional Settings Spark Greatest Ire
The survey highlighted that the faux-informality is especially unwelcome in professional contexts where more deference is expected. A striking eight out of ten respondents objected to doctors, nurses, or police officers using the term.
Furthermore, the use of 'mate' by call-centre staff proved to be a major flashpoint. An overwhelming 90% of women surveyed said they disliked being addressed that way by telephone operators. One female listener vented her frustration to the radio station, saying, "I hate 'mate' as so many men use it in every sentence: 'Evening, mate', 'How you doing, mate?' 'I'm fine, mate'... ad nauseam."
Royal Use Fails to Impress Etiquette Experts
Despite the term's creeping ubiquity across the UK—a linguistic habit long associated with Australia—it has not gained universal acceptance. Even a royal seal of approval has done little to legitimise it in the eyes of manners specialists.
Grant Harrold, a former butler at Highgrove, recalled in a memoir that Prince William once called him 'mate' while he was preparing a romantic meal for the then-Prince and his girlfriend, Kate Middleton.
Nevertheless, etiquette expert William Hanson strongly advises against using what he calls this "plebeian term." He explained, "It is either used because one has forgotten the other person's name – not ideal – or because the user wrongly thinks that by using it, its implied chumminess will increase rapport and speed up the bonding process. It rarely does."
Hanson offered a simple alternative: "Using people's actual names or more specific and less plebeian terms of endearment will always be better." The survey suggests that for a large portion of the UK's older population, this advice would be very welcome indeed.
