In a provocative take on modern parenting, a mother has declared she is actively raising her children to be "duplicitous little Traitors," championing strategic lying as an essential skill for navigating life. The argument, inspired by the cut-throat tactics of the BBC's hit show The Traitors, suggests that inflexible honesty can be a barrier to success.
The Traitors Blueprint for Real Life
The writer states she is firmly "Team Traitor," admiring contestants from the show's fourth series like Rachel, a 42-year-old head of communications from County Down, and Stephen, a 32-year-old cyber security consultant. Rachel took online classes from an ex-FBI agent to read people, while Stephen relies on a good poker face and a Scottish lilt. Their cunning is seen as ingenious, not immoral.
This admiration extends to Alan Carr, who won The Celebrity Traitors in late 2025 and was hailed by some as the "best UK Traitor" for his entertainment value. The piece argues that viewers cheer this duplicity from their sofas, and the lessons go far beyond the television screen.
The Developmental Case for Deception
Citing research, the article makes a case that lying is not just common but developmentally beneficial. Around 95 per cent of adolescents admit to lying to parents, often to avoid trouble or gain autonomy. It's framed as a normal step in forming identity.
More strikingly, studies suggest children who can lie convincingly by age four may show higher executive function and social-emotional intelligence. A 2016 report in Law and Human Behaviour found adults could only spot lies in children 54% of the time. Furthermore, 2018 research from the University of Toronto indicated that learning to lie could improve cognitive skills in preschoolers.
Strategic Lies in the Family Home
The theory is put into practice with the writer's own children, Lola, nine, and Liberty, seven. Examples of their "Traitor" behaviour include using ChatGPT to create a fake poster claiming "Pomeranians are good for a child's mental health!" to trick their mother into buying a £3,000 dog.
Other schemes involved plotting to intercept emails to fake a writing commission for a free dog, deceptive iPad use hidden under a toy turtle, and elaborate ruses to extend playdates by hiding clothes. The writer also recalls "Nutella-gate," where Lola would secretly eat chocolate spread and calmly claim no knowledge of its disappearance.
The article distinguishes between harmful "normal lying" and useful "strategic lying." The latter is presented as vital for adult life: downplaying weaknesses in AI-conducted job interviews, sparing feelings with white lies about unwanted gifts, or politely declining social engagements.
The conclusion is that while society values honesty, the villain archetype provides emotional balance. For children learning the nuanced art of deception, The Traitors offers a masterclass. In a competitive world, the writer asks, wouldn't you rather your loved ones finished first?
