An early years specialist is urging parents to make three subtle but powerful changes to their everyday language, claiming it can dramatically improve their toddler's listening skills and overall behaviour.
The Power of Word Choice in Parenting
Parenting coach Sophie, who shares advice on TikTok, explains that small adjustments in how adults speak to young children can bridge a significant communication gap. This gap often leads to frustration and the dreaded tantrums when toddlers struggle to express themselves or comprehend instructions.
"The tiniest changes to the way we talk to toddlers can literally make them understand on a whole other level," Sophie stated. She emphasised that the resulting difference in a child's listening and behaviour can be "insane."
The Three Key Language Swaps
Sophie highlighted three common phrases parents use that can be swapped for more effective alternatives.
1. Swap "You're Fine" for Acknowledgment. When a child is upset, the instinct is often to reassure with "you're fine." Sophie advises this can dismiss their feelings. Instead, she recommends validating their emotion by saying something like: "You're really upset right now, I'm here." This acknowledges their state without judgement.
2. Swap "Be Careful" for Specific Guidance. While "be careful" is a quick default in risky situations, it's vague. Sophie suggests offering concrete, actionable instructions. For example, ask "Where are you going to put your foot next?" or instruct them to "Hold on tight to the rail." This gives the child clear information on how to stay safe.
3. Swap "Say Please" for Modelling. Constantly prompting a child with "say please" can teach them to wait for the prompt rather than using the word autonomously. Sophie's simple trick is to model the polite language back to them. If they say "banana," you respond with "Banana, please." This naturally reinforces the desired behaviour without direct instruction.
Parental Reactions to the Advice
The advice resonated with many parents online. One user confessed to overusing "be careful," saying: "My daughter was everything I ever dreamed of so I have been SO protective over her... It’s been so hard to step back and let her explore without saying ‘be careful’." Sophie agreed, admitting it's a tough habit to break in the moment.
Another parent praised the tip on teaching manners, calling it a "game changer" for its simplicity and effectiveness. The expert's recommendations, shared in January 2026, focus on building understanding and reducing friction through clearer, more empathetic communication.
By consciously refining these everyday interactions, parents can foster better behaviour and a stronger connection with their toddlers, turning potential conflicts into opportunities for learning and growth.
