For many, the festive season is a time of joy, but for writer Bunny Banyai, one family Christmas descended into a personal nightmare after an attempt to take the edge off with an edible cannabis product went severely wrong.
The Festive Plan to Take the Edge Off
Faced with the classic festive blend of challenging in-laws, a brutally honest father, and politically charged dinner conversation, Bunny Banyai decided she needed a coping mechanism. As a non-drinker, she plotted a different course. Her plan, formulated in mid-November, was to be "just a little bit high" to navigate the day without rage or despair.
A neighbour, upon hearing her strategy, offered a solution from her own stash: a "killer python" cannabis lolly. Assurances were given that it was "nice and mellow" and "very nice and gentle," advice corroborated by the neighbour's visiting mother. While not a regular user, Banyai had prior uneventful experiences with edibles, expecting nothing more than an enhanced appreciation for simple pleasures.
The Descent into a Five-Hour Floor Ordeal
Exhausted from a gruelling December working in a bookshop and a late night wrapping presents, Banyai felt fragile as guests arrived on Christmas Day. Ignoring an inner warning, she consumed half the potent lolly, then impatiently gobbled the rest, later recalling she had been advised to take only a quarter.
The effects were swift and overwhelming. At the lunch table, her plate began to warp, her vision blurred, and she lost the ability to hold her cutlery. With her heart pounding, she fled upstairs, instructing her daughter to fetch her partner before collapsing. She was moved to her own bedroom and arranged face-down on the carpet, where she would remain, immobile and hallucinating, for the next five hours.
Downstairs, the family continued their meal, trying to ignore the spectre of the incapacitated matriarch. Upstairs, Banyai experienced moments of sheer terror, pleading to be taken to hospital. Her sister-in-law, experienced in such matters, calmly dissuaded her, explaining bright hospital lights would worsen the situation.
The Aftermath and a Sober Resolution
The ordeal finally ended as the last guests departed, with Banyai dropping suddenly back into reality. The euphoria of regained clarity almost made the preceding horror worth it, framed as a price paid to avoid the tensions downstairs.
The experience has led to a firm resolution for future festivities. This year, Banyai declares, Christmas will be "raw-dogged"—a medical term she adopts to mean completely sober. No edibles, no alcohol, just her, gravy mix, and the unfiltered chatter of elderly parents.
Bunny Banyai's story serves as a potent, cautionary tale for anyone considering cannabis edibles, especially during high-pressure social gatherings. The line between a mellow buzz and a debilitating, terrifying experience can be perilously thin.
