Comedians Target My Loud Laugh, But I Refuse to Silence My Joy
Jane Howard reflects on a moment when comedian Daniel Kitson nearly ejected her from a comedy room for laughing too loudly and too readily. He chastised her, saying, "that wasn't even a joke," and later requested she reduce her laughter by 10% to avoid ruining the experience for others. Her face turned red as she shrunk in her seat, attempting to suppress her joy, but she still found herself laughing at the absurd request.
A Frequent Target in Comedy Shows
Howard notes that comedians consistently single her out during performances, rarely letting a show pass without commenting on the person with the biggest laugh. This is especially problematic in intimate settings like small tents, where every audience member's face is visible, making it easy to identify the woman laughing deeply and loudly at every joke and even minor humorous moments.
In Scout Boxall's show God's Favourite, which explores a period without bipolar medication, a quip about St John's wort triggered an explosive laugh from Howard. Boxall responded by comparing their jokes to a machine gun or sniper rifle, directly acknowledging Howard's presence in the audience.
Embarrassment and Self-Love in Equal Measure
This loud laughter is the aspect of herself that Howard is most frequently embarrassed by, leading her to hold her breath and shrink down in her seat to suppress it. However, it is also the part she loves the most, representing her at her least self-conscious when overwhelmed by joy. Friends adore this trait, often able to locate her seat in a venue solely by her distinctive laugh, and they laugh both at and with her during shared experiences.
Mixed Reactions from Strangers
While some strangers may find Howard obnoxious, others have approached her with glee, appreciating her free expression of joy. For instance, at the Melbourne Recital Centre during a Taylor Mac performance, an older woman who disliked the show complimented Howard's laugh as wonderful, leading to a humorous theft of a half-drunk bottle of wine from her table.
In Michelle Brasier's Average Bear, after singing "Your lasagne won't make up for my dead dad," Brasier invited the audience to turn to the person laughing the loudest and say "sorry for your loss." Multiple attendees directed this gesture toward Howard on both occasions she attended the show.
Deep Emotional Expression Beyond Laughter
Howard has always been someone who feels and expresses emotions intensely, crying during reading, cinema visits, or while watching TikTok videos. Friends have comforted her during moments of sadness in both life and theatre. She often fears her profound emotional sadness but finds it wonderful that laughter and joy are equally accessible and close to the surface.
Embracing the Upcoming Comedy Season
As comedy festival season approaches across Australia, Howard anticipates that comedians will continue to pick on her. Some may embrace her enthusiasm, while others might be annoyed, but nearly all will notice her presence. Despite any embarrassment or criticism, she remains resolute that nothing will make her stop laughing freely and joyfully.
