Pop icon Gary Barlow has courageously shared previously unseen photographs documenting his significant weight gain, while speaking openly about his battle with an eating disorder. The Take That singer-songwriter admitted he felt like he wanted to "crawl into a hole" when he saw how unrecognisable he had become from the fresh-faced teenager who soared to fame with the legendary boyband.
The Pressure of Fame and Jealousy
Barlow was just a teenager when he joined Take That alongside Robbie Williams, Jason Orange, Howard Donald, and Mark Owen. The group became one of the best-selling acts of the 1990s before their initial split in 1995. Following the breakup, Barlow watched as former bandmate Robbie Williams achieved massive solo success with hits like "Angels" and "Rock DJ," and high-profile collaborations including a duet with Kylie Minogue.
The singer confessed to being "incredibly competitive" and filled with jealousy during this period. "I think I was jealous," Barlow revealed. "What am I going to do with the rest of my life? Because that's it with music now. I can't even walk down the street without someone shouting something about Robbie to me. It was just so excruciating."
Using Weight Gain for Anonymity
In the band's new Netflix documentary, Barlow explained how he began deliberately gaining weight as a strategy to reclaim the anonymity he had lost to fame. "There was a period of about 13 months when I didn't leave the house once," he disclosed. "And I also started to put weight on. The more weight I put on, the less people would recognise me. I thought 'This is good, this is what I've been waiting for, living a normal life.' So I went on a mission. If the food passed me, I'd just eat it... and I killed the pop star!"
Descent into Bulimia
This behaviour eventually developed into bulimia, with Barlow describing nights of binge eating followed by purging. He reached a weight of 17 stone before deciding to take control of his health in 2003. "I would have these nights where I'd eat and eat and eat, but however I felt about myself, I felt ten times worse the day after," he recalled. "You just go off to a dark corner of the house and just throw up, just make yourself sick. You think it's only once and all of a sudden you're walking down that corridor again and again - is this it? Is this what I'm going to be doing forever?"
The Long Road to Recovery
Barlow described a pivotal moment when he decided to change his life: "It was the day when I just went, 'No, I'm not having this anymore, I'm going to change. I want to change and I'm determined that this is not who I've become.'" He acknowledged that while his decline happened relatively quickly, his recovery took much longer. "It only took a few years to get that low, but it took me years to get back to who I wanted to be - 10 years probably," he explained.
Seeking Help and Support
The NHS advises that anyone concerned they might be suffering from bulimia should seek help from their GP. Medical professionals can provide appropriate referrals to eating disorder specialists who can offer comprehensive support. It's recommended that individuals bring someone they trust to appointments if that makes the process easier.
For those struggling with disordered eating, organisations like Beat Eating Disorders provide confidential support and guidance. The charity operates helplines and online resources to assist individuals and their families throughout the recovery journey.
