In a recent podcast appearance, singer and actress Demi Lovato appeared to make pointed remarks about her former relationship with actor Wilmer Valderrama, highlighting the significant age difference that characterised their romance. The conversation unfolded on the latest episode of the Baby, This Is Keke Palmer podcast, where Lovato, now 33, opened up about her experiences as a young star in the entertainment industry.
Reflections on a Challenging Past
During the discussion, both Lovato and host Keke Palmer reflected on entering showbusiness as children and the unique pressures that came with it. Lovato expressed gratitude for her journey despite its difficulties, stating, 'I'm sitting here in this state of mind today, like, grateful for everything that I've been through. It was really challenging. There wasn't a lot of time for play, but when I did, I played pretty hard.'
Age Disparity in Relationships
The conversation turned to relationships when Palmer shared her own experience, saying, 'I feel like people don't understand that that's what we was dealing with, you know? I found myself dating. I'm 15. Why is my boyfriend 20?' Lovato quickly responded with a rhetorical question about her own past: 'Why was my boyfriend 30? You know what I'm saying?'
This exchange clearly referenced Lovato's relationship with Valderrama, which began when she was 18 and he was 30 - a 12-year age gap. Though she didn't mention Valderrama by name, the context made the reference unmistakable to those familiar with her history.
Hindsight and Realisation
Both women discussed how their perspective changed with age. Lovato explained, 'Nobody our age could understand. But then you look back in hindsight, when I turned 30 I was like, "That's not okay."' Palmer added insight about the psychological impact of such realisations, noting it can create 'almost a mental break that can happen because you realize you were taken advantage of. "Oh, I was being exploited."'
The Song '29' and Its Meaning
Lovato specifically referenced her song '29' from her 2022 album Holy Fvck, telling Palmer, 'I also wrote a song about that. It's called 29. And when you listen to it, I think you'll be able to relate to it.' The track has long been speculated to be about her relationship with Valderrama, particularly given its lyrical content.
Some of the song's most revealing lyrics include: 'Far from innocent / What the f***'s consent? / Numbers told you not to / But that didn't stop you' and 'Finally 29 / 17 would never cross my mind / Thought it was a teenage dream a fantasy / But it was yours it wasn't mine.'
Historical Context of the Relationship
Lovato and Valderrama first met in 2010 when she was 17 and he was 29. According to Lovato's 2017 documentary Simply Complicated, she recalled her initial attraction: 'When I met him and I laid eyes on him for the first time, I was in hair and makeup and I was like, "I love this man and I have to have him."' She added that Valderrama initially kept his distance due to her age, but 'After I turned 18, we began dating.'
The couple had an on-and-off relationship that ultimately ended in 2016. They announced their separation in a joint statement, explaining they had 'realized more than anything that we are better as friends.'
Life After the Relationship
Following their breakup, both individuals have moved on with their lives. In 2018, Lovato experienced a near-fatal overdose involving heroin and fentanyl, during which Valderrama reportedly offered support and visited her in hospital.
Valderrama has since been linked to Amanda Pacheco, with whom he shares two children. Lovato, meanwhile, married singer Jutes (Jordan Lutes) in May 2023 during a ceremony in Santa Barbara, California. She described the timing as perfect, telling Who What Wear magazine last November, 'I had expected to be married by a certain age. There's all this pressure that society puts on you, but it just organically happened.'
Current Projects and Health
Lovato remains active in her career, currently preparing for her It's Not That Deep Tour, scheduled to begin on April 13 in Orlando, Florida. The tour will feature performances across the United States and Canada, concluding on May 25 in Houston.
However, the singer recently cancelled several tour dates, including an April 8 concert in Charlotte, North Carolina, explaining she needed to do so 'to protect my health.' This decision follows her recent emotional celebration of an eating disorder recovery milestone, highlighting her continued focus on wellbeing alongside her professional commitments.
Throughout the podcast conversation, Lovato's reflections on her past relationship with Valderrama revealed how her perspective has evolved over time, particularly regarding the age difference that defined their romance during her formative years in the spotlight.
