A 27-year-old woman has written to Daily Star agony aunt Jane O'Gorman seeking advice on how to pursue her mother's partner, whom she describes as fit, solvent, kind, and funny. The woman, who has been single for a while, feels she deserves love and believes there is a spark between her and her mother's boyfriend.
Reader's Dilemma
The reader explains that her mother is an attractive woman who has never struggled for lovers, while she herself has been less lucky. Her last relationship ended when she was made redundant and could no longer pay for her ex-boyfriend's food and petrol. He dumped her by text, saying he had found someone richer.
Now, she has to listen to her mother and her partner having noisy sex all night. She flirts with him, and he flirts back. She told her sister she thinks he fancies her, but her sister dismisses it as him just being nice. The reader is convinced he is her soulmate, citing a car ride where he said she deserves someone special, which she interpreted as him referring to himself.
Jane's Response
Jane O'Gorman advises the reader to forget the idea. She states that the mother and her partner are loved up and committed, and the reader is looking for signs that don't exist. Just because the man is civil doesn't mean he's interested in a relationship. Couples often moan about each other, but that doesn't indicate a breakup.
Jane urges the reader to back off, find somewhere new to live, and get a man of her own. She emphasizes that certain people are out of bounds, and the reader's mother trusts her to be on her side. Jane questions whether the reader would want to be with a man who has been intimate with her own mother.
Final Advice
Jane advises the reader to claw back her dignity by accepting the current situation, learning from past mistakes, and shaping her own future. She warns that the man might be winding her up, sensing her adoration, or that her sister may have said something.
Readers can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.
