Buddhist monk Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche is often cited as the happiest man on Earth. Brain scans have shown off-the-charts activation in his left prefrontal cortex, an area linked to positive emotions. At age 41, his brain reportedly resembled that of a 33-year-old. He also laughs frequently.
Mingyur (Rinpoche is an honorary title meaning "precious one") shared his strategies for a richer life.
Less convenience, more contentment
Mingyur advises sitting with feelings of loneliness or boredom rather than masking them with distractions. "As the Dalai Lama says, we have everything at the touch of a finger, and so when we start to feel lonely, incomplete, bored – we protect ourselves with whatever: eating ice-cream, our smartphone, coffee," he says. "We try to get away from them, but those feelings are wisdom, in a way. The really important thing is to sit with them, embrace them as a path to explore."
For instance, if you find yourself bored while watching a Netflix romcom and scrolling on your phone, that signals that more stimulation will never satisfy. A recent study suggests flicking between videos on social media makes us more bored, not less. Switch everything off, look inward, and stop filling the vacuum with superficial stuff.
Embrace changes (even terrifying ones)
In 2011, Mingyur left his monastery at night with only the clothes on his back to live as a homeless yogi. About three weeks in, he developed severe food poisoning and spent days paralysed by exhaustion and pain – but he now sees this as the moment he began to truly understand the Tibetan Buddhist idea of relinquishing control.
He believes it's possible to experience such growth without such unpleasantness. "Absolutely, of course. Especially nowadays – modern life is full of adventure. When you turn 18, start a new job, start a new relationship – each of those are opportunities for change." But you don't have to wait for bigger moments: meeting new people or taking up a new challenge can increase comfort with new things. Try one small change when a day feels routine: a new route home, or cooking with an unfamiliar ingredient. Keeping a list of things to try can provide a ready-made buffet when life becomes stultifying.
You don't need quiet to find peace
Mingyur admits, "I felt bored the first time I learned meditation. I said, 'Today is breathing. Tomorrow, again, breathing. The rest of this week, breathing. This is stupid.' But for meditation, you need to know two things. One, you can make everything support for meditation – you can meditate anytime, anywhere, with anything. Second, you have to have some creative element with your meditation: everything becomes a friend to the meditation."
If there's traffic noise or someone watching TikTok nearby, let that become a source of focus and calm. Mingyur suggests building up by listening to music, then waterfalls or birdsong, then loud conversations or construction. Eventually, he says, you should be able to meditate while a baby cries.
Use the 'three pillars'
"We think about three things in Tibetan Buddhism: view, meditation and application," says Mingyur. "View is the mindset: we believe that everybody has an inner sky, the qualities of awareness, love, compassion and wisdom. We practise meditation, and then we practise application – building new habits. So it's easy to say: 'Oh, people aren't nice.' But of course there are a lot of great qualities in a lot of people, and if you see that, it will manifest. But it's a habit: you have to keep doing it, and doing it, and then you change."
He suggests doing this in a small way daily. One day appreciate your family; the next, find positive things to say about your most annoying colleague.
Be grateful (for really specific things)
Gratitude lists can feel clichéd, but one approach is to go from general to extremely specific. "I appreciate that I have senses, that there's a roof above me, that I have at least one or two friends or family," says Mingyur. "When you begin to appreciate these things, you start to appreciate the quality of your life and everything around you."
This doesn't mean starting a gratitude journal. After a few days, it can feel too easy to scribble 'I'm grateful for my children'. Instead, use little moments of downtime to notice how nice it is to be in the specific moment, whether sitting in a comfortable chair or watching your child swing a stick in the woods.
The sky doesn't change, even in a storm
Mingyur had panic attacks as a child. He asked his father how to fight them. "He said: 'Don't fight.' The first reason is that if you fight, panic becomes stronger. It's like saying: 'Don't think about orange' – suddenly it's all you can think about. And the second thing my father said is, there's no need to push panic away, because it's like a storm cloud in the sky. A storm cloud can't change the nature of the sky – it comes and then it goes. You just have to connect with the inner sky."
Whatever inner turmoil you face, remind yourself it isn't changing anything fundamental in your brain; it will pass. At times of extreme distress, focus on physical sensations – the temperature of the room, the sounds around you – to deal with panic in that moment, rather than telling yourself everything is fine.
Breathe your way to lasting happiness
"Genuine happiness is when we let go of that feeling of dissatisfaction, incompleteness, that something is missing," says Mingyur. "But if you only look for happiness, then you will get the opposite. People often think, 'I'll be happy if I make more money, or if I move to this new country or get this new job or win the lottery' – but that just changes your happiness a little bit and then you go back to baseline, right? But if you practise breathing, love and compassion, you can move that baseline over time."
To start, sit and breathe naturally, focusing on the rise and fall of your abdomen or the sensation of air passing through your body. You might mentally repeat a simple mantra like "May I be happy and free from suffering" to cultivate love towards yourself, then extend that compassion to loved ones, pets, and eventually all other people.
Anger is like frost on the grass
"What we call awareness is like sunlight, and our emotional patterns are like frost on the grass in the morning," says Mingyur. "When the sunlight manifests, the frost melts automatically – there's no fight. I talk to some business leaders who are really stressed. They have to do so many things at the same time, so they build the habit of being stressed or angry all the time. They come to me and say: 'My relationship is not good,' or 'There's a problem between me and the boss.' I say, 'Just catch the anger. Be with the anger. Just for a second.' Once you catch it, you have a choice, it can transform."
When momentarily furious at someone, avoid snapping by noticing the anger and watching the emotion melt away. This takes practice, but it's worth working on.
And it helps to help other people
"If you can really help others, you feel a different level of happiness from having an ice-cream or a coffee," says Mingyur. We all know this, but how often are we actually doing it? Check in on a neighbour in need today.
