A courageous breast cancer survivor has revealed how she found the strength to walk the catwalk at a charity fashion show following a devastating diagnosis. Jay, 53, was diagnosed with breast cancer on the day of her niece's wedding in August 2021 after she discovered a lump in her left breast.
Initially, doctors had believed the lump was benign. Yet, results from a biopsy would later reveal she had a tumour and required urgent surgery to have it removed. 'I went along to this appointment, and lo and behold there was another lady there who was a specialist cancer nurse. I didn't really hear the consultant saying she was coming in with us,' recalled Jay. 'The three of us sat there and all of a sudden they said, "we're really sorry to say that you have cancer". I think at that moment your world just stops. I asked, "what do you mean, what do you mean?" They asked if I came with anyone, but I said no because I'd been told it wasn't anything important.'
She explained it all to me; we have to remove the tumour, have to do this and have to do that. I just wasn't even listening to her. I just broke down in tears. I was in shock.' Jay, who still bravely attended her niece's wedding that same day, quickly had the tumour removed, followed by reconstructive surgery. The following months were a whirl of chemotherapy, radiotherapy and treatments.
Now, almost five years on, the counselling therapist has found the strength to star as one of Breast Cancer Now's catwalk models in a bid to show that a diagnosis 'doesn't have to stop you living a full life'. Jay was one of 24 models – 23 women and one man all living with or beyond breast cancer – who walked the catwalk to represent Postcode Lottery players who have so far raised £1.6 million for the UK's leading breast cancer charity Breast Cancer Now.
The annual show's aim is to 'raise awareness. To celebrate their individuality. And to show that breast cancer can affect anyone – but it doesn't have to stop you living a full life.' Jay – whose partner, mum and other family members watched on with pride – said: 'I have never experienced anything like that before. This was an opportunity for me to show my friends and people I love, thank you, this is me and I'm living my life. I met so many lovely people and it made me realise that everything I went through was so hard. I'll never forget that.'
People don't realise that it changes your life. I've totally changed as a person. Being here has been the best time, it's honestly been one of my favourite days.' Taking part in the fashion show was a dream come true for Jay, based in Birmingham, because looking good in nice clothes, shoes and make-up was important to her – even during chemotherapy treatment.
She said: 'There were people there with no hair and I was there all dressed up, because that's who I am. I went with my bag and my fancy shoes, had a bit of a laugh and a joke about it. The chemo just took its toll on me. Losing my hair and my eyelashes was huge. I think for me, it was trying to get my identity. Just be me. I'm not a leggings and a t-shirt kind of person. I like to get dressed up. I did that, took my best bag, wore my nice shoes. I used to wear my red lippie, I like my hats and I had to get myself a new scarf.'
At times in her cancer diagnosis, Jay feared she was 'going to die' and that she had 'no time left'. She added that taking part in the show had felt like becoming 'part of a family' who understand what she had gone through. 'I've been very blessed and lucky to have good family and friends. But I know there is a lot of people who don't have that. When you go to a charity or meet other people within support groups, a helpline or being part of this show…you have somebody, you are not alone,' she said.
Yet this isn't the first time Jay has showed her incredible courage during such a challenging period. Following her surgery, Jay even ran a half marathon in Manchester, despite the consultant telling her she couldn't do it. 'I went outside and I thought, "I am doing the run". I ran the half marathon. I strapped myself up and I ran with one arm.' Hosting a large 50th birthday party with her friends and family when she hadn't yet been given the all-clear was a hugely challenging point in her diagnosis, with Jay believing she was 'going to die' and that she had 'no time left'.
'That was a huge thing for me, there was no time left in my life…what was I going to do with my time. I've got so much to do. Then you think about things that have been wasted and what you didn't do,' she said. When Jay finally got the all-clear she defied the medical staff to mark the achievement in the traditional way. She said: 'I wanted to ring the bell, but they said they didn't do the bell. Me and my mum went to a second-hand market, so I thought I'd go and get myself a bell. Then I rang the bell!'
Jay then entered the London Marathon to celebrate four people in her life who had cancer – herself, friend Andrea, her partner's dad and a close friend's mother. She said: 'I walked most of it. It took me over six hours and I struggled, but I got through it. I did this race for all of them and now I look back and it's really hard because they've all passed. My friend passed a year and a half ago and I read a few words at her funeral which was really hard because I was still here and I was talking about our cancer journeys.'
Since then, Jay's been ticking off her bucket list with a trip to the Rio Carnival last year, before heading to the World Cup in June and maybe a trip to Japan later this year. She said: 'I now live life like it's too short and I'm going to do everything I need to do. Unfortunately, I do now suffer from a lot of ailments. Just ongoing, chronic pain and fatigue. They diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. My journey was very, very difficult. You're never the same person; you're never going to be that person again. That's what I found difficult. I cried for the person I was and the person I lost. You do lose a part of yourself, if not all of yourself. But I am still somebody with get up and go.'
She added: 'I think that's what got me through, just being grateful for life and saying, "come on you've got it, you can do it." Some days I go back a little bit. But I try to live my life, to be kind and not get into anything with anybody – and ticking off all the things I want to do.' Rachael Franklin, chief engagement officer at Breast Cancer Now, said: 'We want to say a huge thank you to Jay for sharing her experience and modelling in The Show to raise awareness of breast cancer. The Show by Breast Cancer Now is a fashion show like no other. It is more than clothes, more than style and is about making change happen for people affected by breast cancer. We couldn't do that without people like Jay. I also want to thank the players of Postcode Lottery for supporting Breast Cancer Now and raising millions for us over the years which will go towards funding life-changing support. Events like The Show and partners like Postcode Lottery all contribute to Breast Cancer Now achieving its bold ambition that by 2050, everyone with breast cancer will live and live well.'
Laura Chow, Head of Charities at Postcode Lottery, said: 'Jay's story is inspirational and so moving. She and the 23 other amazing models have turned this year's catwalk into a real celebration of life.'
