Katie Price's ex-husband Alex Reid is preparing to delve into "all of the darkest, horrible stuff" in his life during a new live show, admitting that "Katie is a part of that." The 51-year-old actor and MMA fighter, who once "felt like the most hated man in the country," will take to the stage in his hometown of Aldershot on Sunday, August 30.
Opening up about shame and mental health
Speaking exclusively to Express.co.uk, Reid explained that he wants to use his own experiences to help others. The star, who won Celebrity Big Brother in 2010, said: "I'm doing a talk about mental health, and I'm actually going into it, delving into all of the darkest, horrible stuff with a torch to heal it, and Katie is a part of that."
He continued: "I'm going to explain this is what I learned... I'm looking at all of the darkness in order to help people. I have lived with shame. Shame has been a weapon, an absolute weapon against me, and that is diabolical. So one of the lessons is learning not to let shame happen... and shame was so powerful for so long with me."
Reflecting on celebrity spotlight
Given Katie's profile, their relationship drew considerable media attention and thrust Reid into the celebrity spotlight when they got together in 2009. Although he had already built an impressive profile in both the fighting and acting worlds, this level of fame was something he found difficult to navigate.
"I'm not saying I don't have any responsibility because I went into it. But I didn't know what I was getting into," he admitted. "I was sort of naive. I call it the drug of celebrity. It's extremely addictive. It's the biggest high and the lowest low."
He added: "The things that happen to me happen to lots of people... but mine happened to be magnified a thousandfold because of the celebrity, and trying to have a normal relationship in that world when you've got partners who are actually profiting from the dismantling of your relationship is very difficult, and that's very sad."
Ready to share his story in Aldershot
Reid chose his own hometown to tell his story, admitting this comes with its own fears, but said he is "ready" for the moment. "It's scary to me because I'm exposing myself to the UK. There's going to be bits where I'm reliving things, and it's going to be tough. But... I feel ready to do it. I feel I have to do it because there have been so many untrue things said about me."
He explained: "I need to do this for my family, for me, for my mental health," adding: "I've had nephews and nieces that were bullied and I've been suicidal, and I've had so much pain. I've caused my family so much pain. That's one of the major lessons I've learned."
His friend Simon Gross will present the night, while his vicar will lead the questions. "Simon's lovely, and I've been friendly with him for many years. We did some pantos together. But Simon doesn't know intimately what I'm going to say," Reid reflected. "I've actually got my vicar, who knows me intimately, and he's going to be delving into it. And he's going to be kind, but he's going to be very tough as well."
In summation, he said: "I did the best I could with what I had at the time. I've done things that I'm ashamed of.... I am ashamed of using the celebrity world and losing my way. I've kind of forgiven myself for that because you can't keep beating yourself up. I've also been very vengeful and spiteful. I've learned, and this is what I teach in my talk, how to get over that because it's not constructive for moving forward. And the plan with this is to help people."
A Night Unfiltered with Alex Reid, hosted by Simon Gross, takes place at Empire Banqueting Hall in Aldershot on Sunday, August 30. Doors open at 6.30pm. Tickets are available from Skiddle.
