They Will Kill You Review: A Derivative Cocktail of Horror and Action
In Kirill Sokolov's first English-language feature, They Will Kill You, a housekeeping job transforms into a brutal fight for survival. Zazie Beetz stars as Asia, a new maid at the Virgil, one of New York's oldest and most exclusive co-op residences, which harbors a dark, satanic secret. The film blends action, comedy, and horror into a derivative mix that often falls flat, relying on gore and bad jokes rather than originality.
A Satanic Setting with Familiar Stakes
The Virgil is presented as a luxurious hellscape, complete with an inverted pentagram window, a live-in maid staff with high turnover, and an endless orgy floor. For Asia, the job comes with room and board, but quickly reveals strings attached: she is intended as a human sacrifice to an unholy anti-God. The film wastes no time establishing its stakes, echoing themes from 1943's The Seventh Victim, which linked Manhattan real estate holders with the devil. Sokolov updates this to a beat-'em-up where "death is also epically effin' bad-ass," but the execution feels overly familiar.
Gory Violence and Adolescent Humor
Sokolov's approach to violence is inventive and giddy, with immortality allowing for creative, physics-defying body horror. A standout scene involves a disembodied eyeball rolling through corridors with the locomotion of a remote-controlled toy, showcasing practical effects that add charm. However, the film's tone wavers between bloodbath and bath time, with a boyish immaturity that often feels commonplace and enervating. The script's potty-mouthedness and stylistic flourishes borrow heavily from icons like Sergio Leone, Martin Scorsese, and Quentin Tarantino, resulting in an impersonation of an impersonation with diluted virtuosity.
Supporting Cast and Plot Convolutions
The supporting cast, including Heather Graham, Tom Felton, and Patricia Arquette, is haphazardly assembled, with characters barely differentiated. Arquette attempts an accent of untraceable origins, while Myha'la appears as Asia's sister, whose captivity triggers the rampage. Their sister-sister dynamic adds emotional weight, but the plot relies on lazily resolved convolutions to advance. The film shares similarities with recent releases like Ready Or Not 2: Here I Come, blending hide-and-seek death games with thin class commentary, reflecting a trend in Grand Guignol glibness seen in films like 2022's The Menu.
Final Verdict: Enthusiasm Over Originality
They Will Kill You benefits from sprightly fight choreography, a retro synth score, and a flood of dyed corn syrup, carrying it on guileless enthusiasm typical of low-budget, over-the-top horror. Yet, its inspirations and story components err on the side of the popular and well-trod, making the shtick grow worn quickly. As it quotes Monty Python's "just a flesh wound" bit, the film fails to generate original humor of its own. For fans of gory satanic thrillers, it offers fleeting entertainment, but lacks the freshness to stand out in a crowded genre.
The film is currently in Australian cinemas and releases in the US and UK on March 27.
