In response to a recent letters feature about trains to Speke and buses to Jump, readers have shared their own humorous experiences on public transport.
Childhood Train Scare
Ben Howison from Limpley Stoke, Wiltshire, recalled a childhood journey through East Anglia. Realising he had boarded the wrong train, he asked the conductor for advice. The conductor replied that he wouldn't be able to get off until March. This was in November, and Ben only had a packed lunch with him.
Belfast Bus Banter
Dugald McCullough, a former bus driver in Belfast during the 1970s, remembered being asked: “Does this bus go over the Albert Bridge?” He would reply: “Well, if it doesn’t there’ll be a hell of a splash.”
London Bus Humour
Claude Scott from Richmond, London, recalled a woman boarding a London bus and asking: “Are you going to Turnham Green?” The driver replied: “No, lady, I’m going to paint ’em yellow.”
Tube Station Jokes
Jerry Stuart from London shared his habit of responding to the announcement “The next station is Oval” with a simple “No, it isn’t!”
Tokyo Train Puns
Robert Charlesworth from London noted that in Tokyo, one commuter terminus is Kikuna, which appears on the front of the train. Kiku-na also means “Don’t ask me”, leading to amusing answers when asked where the train goes.
Have an opinion on anything you’ve read in the Guardian today? Please email us your letter and it will be considered for publication in our letters section.
