Bunnie Xo's Harrowing Suicide Contemplation Following Jelly Roll's Infidelity
In a deeply personal revelation, podcaster Bunnie Xo has disclosed that uncovering her husband Jelly Roll's infidelity plunged her into such profound despair that she seriously contemplated ending her own life. The 46-year-old media personality details this traumatic period in her newly released memoir, Stripped Down: Unfiltered and Unapologetic, offering an unfiltered glimpse into the couple's marital turmoil.
Marital Struggles and Suspicious Behavior
Bunnie Xo, whose real name is Alyssa DeFord, recalls growing suspicions about her musician husband's fidelity during a particularly difficult phase of their marriage in 2018. This occurred just two years after they exchanged vows in 2016. At the time, Bunnie was working as an escort while dating Jelly Roll, adding further complexity to their relationship dynamics.
The situation escalated dramatically when Jelly Roll, 41, moved out of their Nashville home following what Bunnie describes as an explosive argument. She subsequently fell into a deep depression, with her fears intensifying when she showed up unannounced at one of his local concerts. Jelly Roll reportedly became irate at her unexpected appearance, though he vehemently denied any unfaithfulness.
The Devastating Discovery
Bunnie's worst suspicions were confirmed when she discovered that Jelly Roll had arranged for an ex-fling to wait for him at a hotel nearby. The painful truth was corroborated by the wife of Jelly Roll's best friend, who confirmed the singer had indeed been conducting an affair.
'She'd confirmed all the suspicions and fears I'd felt for the past ten months,' Bunnie writes in her memoir. 'That night I contemplated taking my life. The pain was so intense that I genuinely just wanted to end it all.'
In her darkest moment, Bunnie recalls grabbing a bottle of pills and seriously considering what it would feel like to die from an overdose. She remembers thinking, 'Would J even care if I was dead?' before ultimately deciding to fight through the pain.
Separation and Attempted Reconciliation
Choosing survival, Bunnie made the decision to move back to Las Vegas, putting physical distance between herself and the source of her heartbreak. Following a three-month separation, Jelly Roll contacted his wife and promised to come clean about his actions.
Despite this promise, Jelly Roll—whose real name is Jason Bradley DeFord—continued to withhold the full truth about his infidelity with the former flame. When the couple returned to Nashville, their relationship imploded once more when Bunnie caught him texting and calling the same woman.
Frustrated by his continued deception, Bunnie decided to seek information directly from the other woman, who provided comprehensive evidence including videos, screenshots, timelines, and details about their ten-month affair. Most shockingly, Bunnie learned that Jelly Roll had purchased a house for his mistress.
'And out of everything, that's what made me sick,' Bunnie reveals. 'It wasn't about him f*****g this broad—it was about emotionally cheating.'
The Painful Path to Forgiveness
Despite the profound betrayal, Bunnie ultimately chose to forgive her husband, though she emphasizes that their relationship did not simply return to normal. 'I'm not going to pretend that we just went back to normal. We absolutely did not,' she explains, noting they had numerous fights and arguments during this difficult period.
During one particularly heated confrontation, Bunnie admits to feeling homicidal when Jelly Roll told her he didn't regret the affair. 'It would take years for me to put the affair aside,' she writes. 'It would take years to actually feel like this man loved me—that I wasn't disposable.'
Jelly Roll's Perspective and Vow Renewal
Last October, Jelly Roll publicly acknowledged that cheating on his wife represented one of the worst moments of his adult life. 'I don't talk about this publicly at all,' he began. 'But one of the worst moments of my adulthood was when I had an affair on my wife.'
The singer explained that the experience made him realize how much he loved Bunnie despite his actions, and that he 'did a lot of work to repair' their relationship, describing the repair process as 'special.'
The couple, who originally married in 2016, renewed their vows in 2023, symbolizing their commitment to moving forward together. Jelly Roll has two children from previous relationships: daughter Bailee, 17, and son Noah, 9.
Bunnie Xo's memoir serves as both a cautionary tale about the devastating impact of infidelity and a testament to the possibility of reconciliation, however difficult the path may be.
