Count Binface, the intergalactic space warrior from Sigma IX, is standing in the Clacton by-election against Reform UK leader Nigel Farage. While bookmakers make Farage the clear favourite at odds of 1/6, Binface is at 7/2, indicating some punters are backing the novelty candidate. Binface, real name Jonathan Harvey, is a comedian and writer who has contributed to shows such as The Thick Of It and Have I Got News For You. Despite his outlandish persona, he claims to offer “sensible policies for a happier Britain.” Most of his policies are jokes, but here are five that even Nigel Farage might support.
Five Binface Policies with Cross-Party Appeal
- All water bosses to take a dip in British rivers — to see how they like it, a nod to the sewage crisis.
- WiFi on trains that works. Also trains that work — a simple demand for functional rail services.
- Cyclists who break the Highway Code to be forced to ride unicycles instead — a humorous take on road safety.
- A ban on speakerphones on public transport — offenders would be forced to live with Matt Hancock for a year.
- Shops that play Christmas music before December to be closed down — and turned into public libraries.
Other policies include giving Wallace and Gromit a knighthood, ensuring 99 flakes cost 99p, giving every British citizen stilts for wet weather, and bringing back Ceefax. While impractical, they resonate with public sentiment.
Binface’s Electoral Track Record
On Thursday, Binface held a “(moral) victory rally” for his Makerfield by-election campaign, where he stood against Andy Burnham, at the Museum of Comedy in London. This is now likely to become his campaign launch for Clacton. He gained 95 votes in Makerfield, while in the 2021 London mayoral election, he received 24,775 first-preference votes. Harvey previously stood as Lord Buckethead, but a row erupted with someone claiming to be the original Lord Buckethead.
Binface Concedes He May Not Win
Asked by BBC Radio 4’s Today programme if he thought he could win the by-election, Count Binface said: “Probably not, but then you know my job is to celebrate and defend the wonders of British democracy. And look at this, eh? The fact that you are interviewing me on the Today programme, because all the other parties aren’t standing, says more about them than it does about me. Are they running scared from old Binny?”
