Jillian Pretzel recounts a lifelong pattern of receiving sound advice from her father, only to deliberately do the opposite. From sports to career choices, she explains how following her own instincts led to fulfillment, even when it meant disappointing a loving but perplexed dad.
The Early Years: Tennis and Horseback Riding
As a child, Pretzel's father encouraged her to pick a sport, practice diligently, and aim for a college scholarship. She chose tennis despite being terrible at sports, but failed to make the high school team. Similarly, he suggested horseback riding lessons, but she was too terrified of animals to even pet a pony. Both experiences left her feeling lost and disappointed.
Academic and Career Advice
Her father pushed STEM careers and bought her a telescope, but she lacked interest in science. When it came time for college, he recommended a large, affordable school near his home. Instead, Pretzel chose a smaller, more expensive university where she felt at home. She later ignored his advice on majors, extracurriculars, and internships, opting for teaching over science or sports.
The Turning Point
At age 17, a friend told her to “do what feels right,” leading her to reject her father's college suggestion. This sparked an experiment: whenever her dad advised something, she would do the opposite. The result was a career in teaching, a love of books and art, and overall happiness, though not wealth or athletic success.
Impact and Reflection
Pretzel notes that her father was never upset by her choices, just confused. She now realizes she internalized his logic—being bold, financially minded, and forward-thinking—even while rejecting his specific recommendations. Recently, she ignored his advice to save money on a family trip to Disney World, booking plane tickets and having a marvelous time.
“I don’t think Dad was ever upset when I didn’t take his advice, but he was usually a little confused by the paths I chose,” Pretzel writes. She concludes that listening to her gut has made her happy, and she hopes she isn't a bad daughter for doing so.
