A Surrey woman who lost her husband four years ago found herself dealing with unfamiliar financial paperwork and pension decisions while grieving. Sharon, who did not give her surname, told Skipton Building Society that her husband had handled most of their financial planning.
“My husband did most of the financial planning,” she said. “We always agreed it, but he was the one who would look out for the best place to do savings.”
“When you lose somebody, you're not really thinking about money. But you're bombarded, truly bombarded, with letters, calls, emails.”
Overwhelmed by financial decisions
Sharon described the experience of suddenly managing two sets of finances as “quite overwhelming” and said it was the first time she felt “a little bit scared.” Her concerns included questions such as “What do I do with this? Where do I put it? What is the best place to put it?”.
An unexpected challenge emerged when her husband's employer contacted her about an approximately £500,000 pension and death-in-service benefit that she had not known about. She was given six months to decide what to do with the money.
“I remember I've been thinking, gosh, you know, I've got no idea. I just remember it being quite scary when you've got a chunk of money that you have to do something sensibly with when your mind is probably not in a very sensible way,” she said.
Support from Skipton
Sharon had begun working with Skipton's financial advice service in 2020, which helped her build her understanding of financial matters. The pension was initially transferred into a pension arrangement, and after discussions about rule changes and her intentions, she named her two godchildren as beneficiaries.
“I said, yeah, let's just do that. So that took a weight off of my mind really, because, you know, you have got to make sure what you're committing to,” she said.
She added that having a financial advisor provided “a second pair of eyes” and assurance, similar to how she had worked with her husband. Over time, she said she felt more confident and knowledgeable about her finances.
Advice for couples
Marc Stewart, head of financial advice distribution at Skipton Building Society, encouraged people to review their pension arrangements and discuss finances with loved ones. He cited Department for Work and Pensions research from 2024 that found nearly half of retired and semi-retired people only begin actively planning for retirement in their 50s.
Stewart advised making a list of all workplace and personal pensions, ensuring both partners know where pensions are held and how to access them. He also recommended regularly reviewing beneficiary nominations and discussing retirement income expectations and goals.
Sharon urged others not to assume everything will work out and to examine their pension arrangements. Skipton members are entitled to a complimentary one-hour Money Review, and more personalised guidance is available through Skipton's regulated financial advice service.
