Long throws have become a scourge on the Premier League. The self-styled greatest league in the world has been drowning in a torrent of guileless ball-flinging. My disapproval dates back to a November 1996 FA Cup tie between Northampton and Watford, a mind-numbing non-event that featured a single goal from Darren Bazeley and endless long throws. Nearly 30 years on, the mere sight of a player towelling down the ball and taking several backwards steps awakens a weary fury. Unless your team has a Rory Delap character, it is just feeding a footballing fruit machine instead of developing actual tactics.
Funny Kits
Not funny-looking kits, but kits with actual comedic intent. Manchester City's 2025-26 third kit, designed to look like a rain-flecked window on a dismal grey day with neon green highlights, was marketed as a tribute to Mancunian weather. Fortunately, City binned that bad idea after one season, choosing instead an AI-generated design for their 2026-27 third kit, selected via a fan vote in January 2025.
Set-Piece Chaos
The VAR decision that decided Arsenal's game at West Ham was correct, but the process revealed five minutes of constant replays of penalty-area lawlessness. Players were grappling, holding, and fouling each other with no attempt to win the ball. This is not the beautiful game. Set pieces used to be a tool for weaker teams, but now even top sides rely on them excessively. Arsenal scored more goals from corners than any team in Premier League history, thanks to accurate deliveries and a willingness to do anything for an advantage. Something must be done to restore skill as the primary match-breaker.
Referees have started intervening preemptively, blowing their whistles and marching into the area to warn players before the kick is taken. This Minority Report approach is infuriating. Let the players play; punish fouls when they happen, not before.
The Wait for Manchester City's Charges
This gripe has been copy-and-pasted from last season. Word has it the verdict is imminent, but 12 months later, it remains on the list.
Dribble Dash
In January 2025, the Premier League launched its own Roblox game, Dribble Dash, aiming at Generation Alpha. The game tasks players with navigating an obstacle course while dribbling a football. However, according to RoMonitor Stats, the largest number of concurrent users on 4 May was three, and on 5 May two. On its worst day in April, just eight people visited, lingering for an average of 15 seconds. Perhaps the Premier League should focus on the actual game of football instead of inventing virtual ones.
