It is a rite of passage for any teenage daughter: raid your mother’s wardrobe and borrow anything remotely vintage or designer, then lose it or ruin it with red wine stains. Harper Beckham, aged 14, has been on a borrowing spree from her mother Victoria’s wardrobe while on holiday in Ibiza. She was spotted with Victoria, 52, her brother Romeo, 23, his girlfriend Kim Turnbull, 24, and friends heading to lunch on Tuesday on the sunny Balearic island, wearing the exact same long, brown and floral figure-hugging chiffon dress that her mother wore only days earlier. On Wednesday, she again adopted her mother’s style by wearing a pink satin dress from Victoria’s upcoming collection as the family headed for a meal in the idyllic haven of Formentera.
Harper is not the first famous daughter to borrow from her mother’s wardrobe. Kaia Gerber, 24, frequently pulls pieces from her lookalike former supermodel mother Cindy Crawford’s closet. At the Toronto International Film Festival in 2024, she wore the same white bodycon Hervé Léger dress her mother wore 30 years ago to the 1993 Oscars. How nostalgic that must have been for the now 60-year-old former supermodel—and what a compliment too. Just as it must be for Victoria, 52.
The Psychological Turning Point
While it is touching for any mother to see her daughter rock a great hand-me-down, it can also become an unspoken issue. For many women on the cusp of their third act, watching their young daughter bloom at the beginning of her first can bring up intense and painful emotions. Like Gerber, Harper is morphing into a mini-me of her mother at lightning speed. Many mother-daughter relationships hit turbulence at this point—a weird parallel universe where looking at your daughter is like looking in the mirror at your past self. It is a hormonal crossroads when daughters hit their teen years just as their mothers hit perimenopause and menopause, which brings mood swings, lack of sleep, hot flushes, lack of libido, and often unpredictable and unwanted changes to body shape.
While the Beckham girls appear best pals on the surface, in some cases this can cause resentment, as daughters become a constant reminder of a former youthful self—not only in looks but also in ambition and possibility. And that is even before factoring in the hormonal clash, which can be quite the ride.
Hormonal Fluctuations
“Both teenage girls and mothers are going through quite similar hormonal fluctuations at this point, so you often have a grumpy teen and a grumpy mother,” says Dr Ghazala Aziz-Scott, clinical director of the Marion Gluck Clinic, specialising in hormone therapy. “As women enter menopause, they do not produce enough progesterone, the calming and soothing hormone in the body, which also fluctuates in adolescents until their menstrual cycles become more regular.”
Hitting the menopause, she adds, is also “a psychological turning point” for women. “The body is changing. Fertility is expiring. Youth is fading. And as you watch your teen child blossom, it can be hard because a lot of women during this time find their self-esteem plummets,” Dr Aziz-Scott explains. “Mothers are also trying to set boundaries for their teens. They want to set an example of good mood regulation, but instead their hormones are all over the place, and this can create insecurity—and often husbands are in the firing line.”
Bonding Through Style
But get it right, and this can also be a time of great bonding, says Professor Carolyn Mair, a cognitive psychologist working in the fashion industry and author of The Psychology of Fashion. For some mothers, she says, this “mini-me dynamic” can reinforce feelings of closeness, legacy, and continuity. “When they borrow or mirror their mothers’ style, it can reflect admiration, a desire to identify with them, or strengthen a sense of attachment,” she explains. “During adolescence in particular, teenagers often experiment with their sense of self as they navigate multiple possible identities by trying on different versions of themselves. Their mother’s wardrobe can become part of that process.”
Yet, while many mothers may feel pride, affection, and a hint of nostalgia when seeing aspects of themselves reflected in their daughters, she says that “those same moments can also bring an unwelcome awareness of ageing, shifting identity, or the passing of youth.” Such feelings may be especially pronounced in cultures or communities that place a particularly high value on youthfulness and appearance.
Brand Beckham and the Double-Edged Sword
Of course, being in the fashion and beauty worlds, Victoria Beckham will know that value more than anything. It is why Victoria will know that Harper wearing her clothes will surely help Brand Beckham sales. Unlike many teens, Harper is not attempting to forge her own unique individual style and buy clothes from Shein or Pretty Little Things like other teens, which Victoria will take as a huge vote of confidence. But that is not to say it won’t also be triggering. The trouble is that for somebody who is so conscious of her looks, it may well be a wake-up call as she looks at Harper in their matchy-matchy outfits. It is what is known as the double-edged sword of having a mini-me—and for many mothers, it is a hard pill to swallow.
Harper is also reportedly launching a beauty range this summer aimed at Gen Z and Gen Alpha, inspired by South Korean cosmetics—just as her mother revealed last week in the Financial Times that she is open to selling her now hugely successful fashion label. As Harper pushes forward in her full glory, Victoria is potentially planning to slow down. The real test will come when it is Harper’s name that is called first. It remains to be seen whether Victoria will be happy to step into the shadows or whether she will want Harper to live permanently in hers.
