Loose Women panellist Jane Moore has spoken openly about her decision to place her mother, who has Alzheimer's, into a care home. Speaking on Wednesday's show, she admitted she "never felt bad" about the move, adding: "I don't do guilt."
Desperate Plea for a Break
The ITV show returned with Christine Lampard, Sue Cleaver, Janet Street Porter, and Jane Moore discussing whether elderly loved ones should live with family. Jane recalled a two-to-three-year period when her mother "fought me at every turn," including a time she came to live with her despite Jane having no downstairs toilet.
"The whole thing just became untenable and she fought me at every turn, in the end I remember I just got so desperate I found this local care home and I rang them and said 'look, can you take her for just like three or four weeks, I just need a break'," Jane said. At the time, she was also going through a divorce and working, and it was "all caving in on me."
Finding the Right Home
Her mother eventually moved into an "eye wateringly expensive" care home where she did not settle. Jane then moved her to a "more middling care home, which is lovely, and she's now very settled, but it took years." She explained her mother "can't be left, she needs nursing care, she wanders, she gets up in the middle of the night."
Jane said she visits her mother every other day. She added: "I unapologetically did what I think was not only right for my mother but right for me as well, my kids, her grandkids, they can now go and see her."
Co-stars Share Fears
Jane continued: "I know people have put people into care homes and felt terrible guilt about it, but I'm not a nurse, I don't have the skills to be a dementia carer. It takes real specialist knowledge and care and systems and safeguarding, etc., so for me, it's the best place for my mother to be."
Sue Cleaver shared her own fear: "My biggest fear is, I'm so worried about somebody being unkind to her in a home, and yet I know I'm not a nurse, I wouldn't be equipped to deal with those things should they arise. It just scares me so much." Janet Street Porter urged viewers: "Please plan ahead. If you think you're mentally sound start thinking about if you want someone to come and support you in later life, is there anywhere in your home that they can live? You must plan ahead."
Loose Women airs weekdays at 12.30pm on ITV.
