Jeremy Clarkson has said his Clarkson's Farm co-star Kaleb Cooper is 'not talking to him' after his latest 'disasters' at his Diddly Squat farm. The 66-year-old TV star has revealed how his idea to start breeding rabbits went horribly wrong and that he left farm manager Kaleb unimpressed after he decided to plant and harvest flax.
Rabbit breeding plan backfires
In his latest column for The Sunday Times, Jeremy wrote: "Job one. I'd heard that no one is currently farming rabbits in this country and that butchers have to import whatever the pub and restaurant trade need from France. That's an opportunity, right there', I thought. How hard can it be? Rabbits breed like rabbits, so I'd be in the money from the get-go."
However, things didn't go to plan, as the former Top Gear host explained: "It turns out that rabbits don't breed like rabbits. They breed like pandas. It's nigh on impossible to get them to have sex and even if you manage it, the ladies rarely get pregnant."
He added: "Also, rabbits are extremely vicious, which is a problem if, like me, you're on blood thinners. I've never once been hurt by a cow, but every time I emerge from the daily rabbit attack, I'm bleeding so profusely I look like that fountain in Geneva."
Flax harvest infuriates Kaleb
But it was his plan to start growing flax, which is used to make linen, which infuriated Kaleb, as the crops had to be harvested using a special machine, and then they had to be "scooped up" by hand and placed in "water bowsers" due to the lack of rainfall this summer.
Jeremy explained: "What equipment do you use to do this scooping? To find that out, I consulted Britain's leading expert on flax ... And he said there is no equipment anywhere near the Cotswolds that could do it, so it would have to be done by hand. And how long would this take? 'Working a 50-hour week, it would take a team of 40 people a year.' So the next time you wonder why linen is expensive."
He added: "Kaleb, meanwhile, is not talking to me. He says I've got to stop coming up with harebrained schemes without thinking them through. And points out that as there's no way in hell we will be able to collect everything we grew, the vast majority will just sit there, being shat on by dogs until it has decomposed."
Health update and show future
It comes after Kaleb was left in tears when Jeremy revealed he had been diagnosed with "aggressive" prostate cancer, which had been discovered early, in the final episodes of series five of his Amazon Prime documentary series, Clarkson's Farm.
Later, speaking from a hospital bed at the end of the season finale, Clarkson revealed he had experienced complications during treatment. He said: "We started season five with me in a hospital bed and here we are at the end of season five and I'm back in a hospital bed."
On the show's future, he added: "What I wanted to say was if this is all successful, I'll see you for season six, and if it isn't, I won't. Take care, everyone." The sixth series of the show is due to air in 2027, which comes after Jeremy confirmed in June that a PSA test two months earlier had revealed no indication of cancer, and that he is in remission.
