Melissa Auf der Maur, bassist of Hole, has selected her photograph of Courtney Love doing makeup backstage at the 1995 Lollapalooza tour as her best shot. The image, featured in her new book, captures a pivotal moment when alternative music crossed into the mainstream, set against the backdrop of Kurt Cobain's death and corporate influence.
Discovering a Lifelong Passion
Auf der Maur recalls her first self-portrait, taken at Père Lachaise Cemetery in Paris in front of Jim Morrison's grave when she was 13, on a trip with her father. She explains that photography was the first thing that gave her a sense of agency, a way to create her own universe. It became her first love before music sidetracked her.
Documenting a Generation
Her camera documented her generation being "hijacked by corporate greed" and "destroyed in the wake of the sacrificial death of Kurt Cobain." She describes Lollapalooza '95 as a generational call to document the tour, noting it was "when the wild alternative freaks crossed into the mainstream."
Trust and Essence
As a female photographer in Hole, not a girlfriend or outside male photographer, Auf der Maur could capture the band's essence, particularly Courtney Love. She says Love trusted her implicitly, either not noticing the camera or giving herself to it, allowing her to capture Love's true essence. Auf der Maur was asked to take photos for a Spin magazine tour diary, a task that felt grown-up for a 23-year-old.
The Photograph's Significance
Using a new Nikon point-and-shoot with a wide-angle lens, Auf der Maur captured the spirit of those central to the story. The photo was taken near the end of the three-week tour, and having half a roll of film from that moment indicates the band was feeling strong that night. She notes this was rare for a band "living in the wake of death, with the struggles of addiction and with enemies on the tour." At the peak of their alternative power, co-headlining with Sonic Youth, Courtney was "giving her all" despite her life being "an absolute nightmare" and a rivalry with Sonic Youth.
Auf der Maur describes her life in Hole as the defining role of that decade, shaping her spiritually, emotionally, musically, and publicly. Her portraits of Courtney in the book are "loving and true." The book, Melissa Auf der Maur: My '90s Rock Photographs, is published by DelMonico Books and accompanies an exhibition at the Art Gallery of Ontario until 6 June 2027.
