Wasteman Prison Thriller and If I Had Legs I'd Kick You Comedy Film Reviews
Two compelling new British films have arrived in cinemas, offering starkly different yet equally gripping portrayals of human struggle. Wasteman, a brutal prison thriller, and If I Had Legs I'd Kick You, a painfully funny dark comedy, both demonstrate the vitality of contemporary British filmmaking while exploring characters facing seemingly insurmountable challenges.
Wasteman: A Harrowing Prison Drama
Wasteman represents a tremendously assured debut feature from director Cal McMau, presenting a riveting lead performance by David Jonsson that confirms his status as one of the most skilled actors of his generation. Following his delightful turn in the sweet South London rom-com Rye Lane (2023), Jonsson here portrays Taylor, a long-time inmate trying to survive ahead of his impending release.
Taylor embodies the dead eyes and shambling walk of an institutionalised drug addict, having served 13 years for supplying fatal drugs. The film's title reflects his societal status as someone considered a waste of time, money, and space. Inside prison, he maintains a quiet existence with a canteen job and hair-cutting sideline, unexpectedly learning he will soon go free, presumably through the controversial 'emergency early release scheme' introduced to combat overcrowding.
McMau was reportedly inspired to make this film after viewing real mobile-phone footage from prisons, and with actual former prisoners as extras, Wasteman presents an authentic depiction of life behind bars. The system teeters on anarchy, with drugs and mobile phones delivered by drone and daily assaults carried out with impunity.
As Taylor prepares to leave this environment, he must contend with a psychotic new cellmate, Dee (Tom Blyth, also terrific), who helps him contact his 14-year-old son but with ulterior motives centered on control. Dee's aggressive ambition to become the prison's de facto boss clashes with other hard-knock inmates, forcing Taylor into increasingly desperate navigation between factions while trying to clean up his drug habit and avoid trouble.
McMau builds tension superbly throughout this gut-punching drama, which operates in the uncompromising tradition of Scum (1979) and Starred Up (2013). The film serves as both a testament to British film-making's strength and a stark indictment of the British penal system's failures.
If I Had Legs I'd Kick You: A Darkly Comic Struggle
If I Had Legs I'd Kick You offers a different but similarly frantic exploration of one person's efforts against overwhelming challenges. Rose Byrne delivers a beautifully nuanced performance as Linda, a psychotherapist already awarded a Golden Globe and favored for Best Actress at next month's Academy Awards.
Linda specializes in helping others find balance in their lives while her own existence tilts dangerously toward the abyss. She cares for a sick daughter requiring constant attention, a situation complicated when they must move into a shabby motel after their apartment floods from a spectacular ceiling collapse. Her husband (Christian Slater) adds stress through judgmental calls from sea, and she receives little empathy from her therapist colleague (Conan O'Brien).
Writer-director Mary Bronstein channels her own experiences caring for a seriously ill child, describing the film as 'emotionally true' rather than autobiographical. The result is a madcap take on the multi-tasking demands of motherhood, interspersed with moments of pure surrealism and riotous black comedy, such as Linda's struggle with a hamster loose in her car.
Significantly, the camera offers numerous unsparing close-ups of Byrne while rarely dwelling on her daughter, emphasizing that this story concerns a child's illness primarily through its effect on the mother. The film's producers include Bronstein's husband Ronald, who co-wrote Marty Supreme with Josh Safdie, and Safdie himself, contributing to the film's whirling, kinetic, chaotic energy reminiscent of both Marty Supreme and 2019's Uncut Gems.
This rewarding but crazy film provides an exhausting yet compelling 113-minute experience that challenges conventional comedy boundaries while exploring profound emotional truths.
Both Wasteman and If I Had Legs I'd Kick You are now showing in cinemas, offering audiences powerful examinations of human resilience against extraordinary circumstances through distinctly British cinematic lenses.
