Coco Khan, a freelance writer and co-host of the podcast Pod Save the UK, argues that the true indicator of societal decline is not potholes but the deteriorating quality of shoelaces on expensive trainers. She observes that modern 'optimised' shoelaces, often made from synthetic materials, fail to stay tied, despite their marketing as high-performance.
The Problem with Modern Shoelaces
Khan notes that shoelaces have one job—to stay tied—but many now slip quickly. She points to online discussions on Reddit, Quora, and Facebook where others share similar frustrations. Some have turned to knot science, learning that common tying methods like the 'granny knot' are destined to fail. She writes, 'Physicists say it is “destined to fail” – much like we are if we keep putting our physicists on jobs like this.'
Personal Obsession and Trainer Culture
Khan describes her long-standing obsession with shoelace failure. As a fan of trainers, she noticed that in the 2010s, new designs marketed as 'cutting edge' and 'technical' often featured thinner, rounder laces made from synthetic or coated materials. While these looked great and promised cleanliness, they slipped more easily. 'They do not do the one thing we ask of them. They do not stay tied,' she writes.
Impact on Daily Life
Khan recounts the frustration of tripping over undone laces in public, such as in co-working spaces or on escalators. She notes that synthetic laces like nylon and polyester are cheaper to produce, a detail omitted from marketing. This, she says, reflects a broader trend of 'enshittification'—the process of making things worse disguised as progress.
Broader Societal Reflection
Khan ties this to wider societal issues, such as walking around in expensive fitness clothes during an obesity crisis or technical outdoor wear for trips we cannot afford. She states, 'We project affluent lives we don’t really lead – while those who do partly got there by the business of making everything just a little bit worse for us.' She concludes with a nod to Oscar Wilde: 'We’re all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Or rather, some of us are looking at our shoes, wondering how we got here.'
