A woman who called off her wedding last month after discovering her fiancé had cheated on her with a guest is seeking advice on how to move on with her life.
In a letter to Coleen Nolan, the reader explains that she found out by chance in June that her fiancé had been unfaithful with someone who was due to attend the wedding. She was so angry that she told him it was off and that they were over.
Guilt and sadness after calling off wedding
Now that her anger has subsided, she says she feels sad and broken, with almost daily reminders of the wedding that never was – including bills to pay, things to send back, and her wedding dress still hanging in the wardrobe.
She adds that everyone in her life has been brilliant, particularly her parents, who lost money after already paying for things like the venue. She feels guilty for letting people down, even though they all tell her she did the right thing. Her ex hates her too, even though he was the one who blew their lives up.
Coleen Nolan's advice: 'You did a brave thing'
Coleen Nolan responds by telling the reader she did a brave thing and it was “100 per cent the right thing to do”. She says that if the wedding had gone ahead, it would have been a bigger waste of money and a lot harder to get out of, going through solicitors and divorce proceedings.
Nolan advises the woman to sell the dress, the ring, and anything else wedding-related, and offer the money to her parents. She also encourages her to think, “Phew, that was close, but I’m out of it and can now move on with my life”.
Moving on and not looking back
Nolan reassures her that her friends and family, especially her parents, are not blaming her or thinking badly of her, and that blame is reserved for her ex, who brought everything crashing down on his own.
She advises the reader to lean on the great people around her and turn her mind to her future, which can now be great, and to take strength from knowing she did something really brave for herself. She concludes: “It’s going to hurt for a while, but don’t spend a minute worrying about what he thinks. This is all on him, he’s the one who should carry the guilt and he didn’t deserve you.”
