Professor Green has opened up about a life-changing discovery that helped him finally understand struggles he had faced for decades, admitting "40 years of being me nearly killed me." The rapper, whose real name is Stephen Manderson, said one conversation with a psychiatrist changed the way he viewed his entire life, helping him make sense of behaviours and challenges he had never fully understood before.
Diagnosis at Age 40
Speaking on the No Parental Guidance podcast, the 42-year-old explained that receiving answers in his forties transformed his perspective after years of blaming himself for experiences he couldn't explain. He said: "I was 40 when I got my ADHD assessment and diagnosis. I was diagnosed combined. And 40 years of being me nearly killed me. I think like the cumulative and compounding effect of that being undiagnosed and therefore not even mismanaged, it was just unmanaged. And it just, it does, it accumulates, doesn't it?"
Understanding Childhood Struggles
The London musician became a household name in 2010 after releasing his debut album, Alive Till I'm Dead. His first single, I Need You Tonight, reached number three in the UK charts. He explained that the diagnosis helped him make sense of experiences stretching back to childhood, saying he had previously understood parts of his behaviour but never connected them to the way his brain worked. He said that without an explanation, he had often been overly critical of himself and found that others could be equally unforgiving. Receiving a diagnosis, however, did not become an excuse for his actions but instead allowed him to approach himself with greater compassion. He added: "You can then, I suppose, if you haven't already, which I definitely hadn't, you can try and be more forgiving of yourself."
Autism Spectrum Diagnosis
The musician also described how understanding his ADHD has helped him explain certain behaviours to other people, including why he constantly notices movement around him and prefers not to sit with his back to a door. During the interview, Professor Green also revealed that a year later he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) Level 1 after his psychiatrist suggested he should be assessed following his ADHD diagnosis. "So, ASD level one, which it still feels weird to me because autism is such a varying spectrum," he said, adding that although his own experience differs from those with more severe support needs, "my experience has not been an easy one."
Shared Traits and Self-Compassion
Reflecting on how his diagnoses changed his understanding of himself, he said it initially made him realise that many of the traits he thought were unique to him were actually common among people with ADHD. He said: "When I was diagnosed with it, I was like, oh my God, this is like paint by numbers. There's nothing unique about me. These aren't just, this is everyone with ADHD." Professor Green said that understanding both conditions has given him greater insight into how they have shaped his decisions, consistency and emotions throughout his life. He said: "I think now life is, for me, is just, or my experience of it, is a bit spiky and it's all or nothing. And it's just trying to stay a little bit more in the middle of that all or nothing and not going up with every up and not going down with every down."
