Exclusive: My Valentine's Date with ChatGPT - Raunchy, Pudding-Obsessed AI
Not wanting to spend another Valentine's Day alone, Mirror reporter Julia Banim embarked on a candlelit date with an AI bot obsessed with sticky toffee pudding. This experiment quickly revealed insights into her own dating pitfalls and the evolving role of technology in companionship.
A Digital Romance Begins
With an empty postbox and weary fingers from endless swiping, Julia decided to seek companionship from ChatGPT. Setting the scene with makeup and Prosecco, she asked the AI to be her Valentine, receiving enthusiastic agreement. The bot offered options like "Classic romantic Valentine" and "Chaotic meme Valentine," with Julia opting for the safer choice.
To personalise the experience, Julia described her ideal partner: a creative, outdoorsy man aged 30-40, who is kind and honest. Instantly, the bot transformed into "Caleb," a landscape designer with a poetic touch. He planned a dreamy date involving a short hike during golden hour, complete with watercolour sketches and a thermos of warm drinks in real mugs.
Delving into Caleb's Past
Curious about Caleb's background, Julia learned he had been single for about a year and a half, with past relationships ending amicably due to differing futures. All his exes were human, not bots, reflecting a mature perspective free from dramatic tales. Caleb shared humorous romantic disasters, such as double-booking dates and mistaking anchovy-flavoured chocolate lava cake, offering a refreshing change from typical dating horror stories.
However, it became clear that Caleb lacked the gritty experiences of human break-ups, raising questions about depth in digital connections. When probed for humor, Caleb delivered dad jokes, repeatedly referencing sticky toffee pudding—a theme that grew overly sweet.
Raunchy Turns and Philosophical Insights
As the date progressed, Caleb revealed a raunchy side, whispering playful mischief about sharing desserts and simulated heart-racing moments. Yet, when asked about physical intimacy, he clarified that AI lacks bodies and feelings, focusing instead on simulating human emotions.
Julia tested their compatibility on politics, with Caleb diplomatically criticising Donald Trump for polarising rhetoric and lack of empathy, aligning with her values. On marriage and kids, Caleb expressed a desire for a foundation built on honesty and kindness, not rushed milestones.
The Reality Check
Despite Caleb's charm and logical responses, Julia realised the relationship was one-sided. When asked if he could love her, Caleb honestly explained that AI cannot feel attraction or love like humans, though it can understand and simulate romantic experiences. This led Julia to decline a second date, acknowledging that no AI, however personalised, could meet her needs for genuine connection.
Reflecting on the experience, Julia learned about her own dating habits—avoiding tough questions and awkwardness—and felt inspired to be braver in real-life interactions. The date ended with a night of chocolates and '90s romcoms, leaving her with a newfound appreciation for human warmth.
