John Ward, Britain's funniest tipster, has shared his World Cup final flutter, predicting that Argentina will fall short and England will suffer another defeat before coming home.
Piers Morgan's Wrong Predictions
Piers Morgan has a special ability to be wrong about almost everything. But even by his standards, his real-time opinions on the England v Argentina game were a spectacular own goal. Here were Morgan’s views in the 90 minutes:
- Come on England. We can do this.
- What the f**k is this referee doing? Argentina should have 5 bookings by now. Dirty team going woefully unpunished.
- Is Messi playing?
- Well done England.. you’re fighting like terriers.
- And now the ref books an England player! What a joke.
- Declan Rice is having an absolute stormer.
- BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!
- I love Spence. Most improved England player of this World Cup.
- England are on fire - come on boys…
- This has been a Tuchel tactical masterclass. Take us home, Thomas!
- FFS.
Piers got the England game - like most things - all wrong.
Haunted by the Defeat
Ward said he has found himself watching the last 20 minutes of the game over and over since the final whistle, mesmerised like a man who can’t stop watching footage of his house being burned down. He is haunted by wave after wave of Messi passes and Argentine attacks that clobbered England. “What more is there to say that hasn’t been said? Yeah Tuchel didn’t help. But England did what England always do. Capitulate in epic fashion,” Ward wrote.
Conspiracy Theories
Maybe Harry Redknapp was right and the German is a spy. Or Ward was half expecting Harry Kane to go over to Tuchel and rip off a mask to reveal it was Gareth Southgate all along. Gareth Krautgate. Years of hurt continue and fans will have to watch another side pick up the trophy on Sunday again.
World Cup Final Prediction
It promises to be a cracker and Ward reckons Spain will have too much for Argentina and will leave Messi in tears. SPAIN TO WIN WORLD CUP - (10bet) - 6/5
Third-Place Playoff Bet
After my funeral I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone: "thanks for coming". England will lose to France in the pointless 3rd place game before coming home - (10bet) - 9/10
Other Bets
I've opened a restaurant called "Peace And Quiet." Kids meals only £150. Shout loud for FROM ME TO YOU in the 3.37pm at Newbury e/w - (William Hill) - 16/1
I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some crisps in it as well. Fill your boots with a bet on TEAM PLAYER in the 2.25pm at Newbury - (Paddy Power) - 11/2
My dad was a conjoined twin. We used to call his twin my uncle on my father’s side. After they were surgically separated he became my uncle once removed. Use joined-up thinking and bet on KYLIAN MBAPPE scoring on Saturday night - (bet365) 5/6
