Former Carlton co-captain Sam Docherty has opened up about the mental toll of his final season, revealing that his mind, not his body, ultimately forced him to retire. The 31-year-old, who endured two bouts of cancer, three knee reconstructions and numerous other injuries, says he doesn't miss the constant pain or the internal politics at the club. But he admits to a void left by the structured, purpose-driven life of an elite athlete.
Docherty described his obsessive streak as both a help and a hindrance. 'As an athlete, they’re great traits to have at times, but they can also be incredibly unhealthy,' he said. His obsession with detail allowed him to push through gruelling rehab and even run 400m sprints between chemotherapy cycles. However, it also contributed to a gambling problem.
Diagnosed with testicular cancer early in the Covid-19 pandemic, Docherty discovered a lump he described as 'ropy and tough'. The cancer spread to his lymph nodes, lungs and stomach, requiring four cycles of chemotherapy. Under strict lockdowns, he couldn't have visitors and lost so much weight he looked like 'a pale, smooth sickly creature' from Lord of the Rings.
His father Eddie died of a heart attack at 53 while Docherty was on a pre-season camp in Arizona. Days into his time at Carlton, he was handed a phone with the news. His first serious knee injury came at a potholed dog park, and he later tore the same knee again in a drill called 'The Barbarian'. An expert told him he would forever be a 'joint compromised athlete'.
Despite the hardships, Docherty says he finds himself missing the clear purpose of football. 'That process-driven, elite-athlete lifestyle... it could be all-consuming, but it’s also something I find myself missing in retirement,' he said. Now a year on, he is adjusting to life without the spotlight and the constant pain.
