Tanya Gold, a writer, has opened up about her long struggle with alcoholism, describing it as a condition that persists long after the drinking stops. In a candid account, she revealed how she relapsed during childbirth in 2013, using morphine in hospital, after 11 years of sobriety.
Gold described the experience of giving birth while high on medical-grade opiates, recalling that she told the midwife her husband was trying to kill her, citing a tin of biscuits as evidence. After the birth, she locked herself in her bedroom without the baby, looked at photographs on Facebook, and ate a ham.
She explained that alcoholism is a way of thinking, a malevolent voice in the head that wants the alcoholic to die. Despite being sober for 15 years, Gold said she still battles this inner voice daily, and that recovery is a matter of 'daily remission'.
Gold traced the beginning of her recovery to a moment in 2002 when she looked in the mirror and said, 'I hate you and I wish you would die.' That realisation, she said, led her to attempt a year without alcohol, which eventually became long-term sobriety.
