Chantelle Wynn, whose husband Ryan took his own life while living with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after serving in Afghanistan, has spoken of the moment she discovered his body and the support her family later received from The Royal British Legion.
Ryan Wynn, a Territorial Army frontline medic, returned from a six-month tour of Afghanistan in 2006 a changed man. He was diagnosed with PTSD but struggled to find help. On November 10, 2015, the eve of Armistice Day, Chantelle and her eldest daughter Rosie, then 14, found him dead in the garage at their home in Staffordshire.
A devoted father changed by war
Chantelle, now 49, described Ryan as the "life and soul of a party" who loved being a family man. He had wanted to follow his father and brother into the army but joined the Territorial Army because he was deaf in one ear.
After returning from war, he would sit in silence, and fireworks would send him running for cover. When Chantelle tried to help him talk about what he had seen, he refused, saying: "It's tortured me enough, it doesn't need to torture you."
In 2015, Ryan hit rock bottom and attempted to take his own life in his car. Chantelle said she had to hide everything she could think of to protect him. He once came home smelling of petrol after claiming he had been at a friend's house, before breaking down and saying he couldn't go through with it.
The day tragedy struck
Chantelle received a phone call from Rosie saying she had come home and could not find her dad, though his shoes were in the house. Chantelle returned home and raised the alarm, but then noticed the garage door was locked when it was usually accessible for the girls to go through to the back of the house.
"I immediately knew something wasn't right and ran into the garage to discover Ryan had taken his life. I didn't realise my daughter Rosie was behind me. It's your worst nightmare," she said.
The street was locked down like a crime scene, and the family were not allowed into the house. Chantelle still lives in the family home, but the garage has been demolished as a grim reminder of their loss.
Finding help with the Royal British Legion
Chantelle said she was told the girls would not be able to get help for six months and should just grieve. A friend suggested she ring The Royal British Legion, though she initially thought it was for veterans rather than families.
Annette from the West Midlands team came to see her within a few weeks of Ryan's passing. The charity helped the family cope with their first Christmas without Ryan, providing food hampers and presents for the girls, and sent them on a holiday to Nottinghamshire Center Parcs.
"The holiday allowed us to reconnect as a family of three and took us out of the bubble we had been living in since Ryan's passing," Chantelle recalled.
Giving back at the Festival of Remembrance
Both daughters went to university. Daisy, now 21, works as a physiotherapist, and Rosie, 25, prepares Education, Health and Care Plans for children. Rosie said the Royal British Legion helped them through the "hardest time of our lives," adding that the charity made her realise how important family is.
The family will attend the Royal British Legion's Festival of Remembrance this weekend to thank the charity for everything it has done for them. The event from the Royal Albert Hall will be shown at 9pm on BBC1 tonight (Sat 7 Nov). Samaritans can be contacted for free, day or night, 365 days a year, on 116 123.
