Daniela Barroso, 22, has been unable to leave her home since March after her obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) intensified, leaving her convinced she had pushed someone off a bridge or said something awful to a friend. She began recording every moment of her life, including using the toilet, to try to distinguish reality from intrusive thoughts, but still doubts the footage is real.
Early symptoms and diagnosis
Barroso first experienced OCD symptoms at age eight, washing her hands up to 30 times an hour until they bled. She would go through three bottles of hand sanitiser a day. Her mother took her to a doctor, where she was diagnosed with contamination OCD, a subtype characterised by fears of germs. Her parents hid the soap, only allowing access when she used the toilet, which eased the symptoms temporarily.
At 14, she developed religious OCD and felt compelled to kiss every statue of Mary and Jesus in her house before leaving. “It got to the point where if I left the house and forgot my AirPods or something, I couldn’t go back inside, because it would take me 20 minutes to kiss all of the statues,” she said. Her mother eventually hid the statues. She then developed an extreme aversion to the numbers three and six, viewing them as “devil numbers”, and avoided aisles three and six while working at a supermarket.
Treatment and relapse
In October 2022, aged 18, Barroso was prescribed sertraline and began cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and exposure therapy in December 2022. The therapy helped, with her therapist making her go down aisle three. “It really helped,” she said. But after three months, in February 2023, the sessions—paid for by her employer—stopped, and she stopped taking her medication because it caused migraines.
Her condition deteriorated, and she began smoking and drinking heavily to calm her symptoms. In November 2024, she said “everything came crashing down” and she developed constant intrusive thoughts, texting friends repeatedly to check if she had said or done something wrong. She started self-harming and attempted suicide. She dropped out of university in December 2024, moved back in with her parents, and became unable to leave the house.
Current struggles
Doctors tried different antidepressants, but Barroso said they did nothing. “I was just taking a pill and hoping that I would magically wake up one day and be normal again,” she said. Throughout 2025, her symptoms worsened to the point where her mother had to stand outside the toilet to ensure she did nothing “bad” while alone. “I couldn’t cook a meal because I would convince myself I’d put bleach on my food, or I’d sat on it, so I had to put it all in the bin,” she said.
She now feels her OCD has consumed her identity: “I feel like I don’t have a personality anymore because this has taken over my whole life.” She is on the NHS waiting list for more therapy but has not heard anything since November.
