Keeley Hazell, the former Page 3 model, has brought her memoir Everyone's Seen My Tits: Stories and Reflections from an Unlikely Feminist to the Edinburgh fringe festival as a theatre and comedy show. Reflecting on her career, she said topless modelling 'never really aligned with me as a person.'
From Page 3 to the stage
Hazell, born in Lewisham, London, left modelling in her early 20s and moved to Los Angeles to pursue acting. The emotional impact of her time in the industry inspired the 2025 book, which she described as a 'release' during an interview in London. 'I was able to give myself a voice,' she said, for 'a period where I felt voiceless.'
The show makes her think 'of the image of Russian dolls – I'm performing as me, but then I'm also performing as a version of me.' She recalled 'presenting differently' from the Keeley Hazell on magazine covers, wearing 'vintage clothes and very grungey,' and often denying she was a Page 3 model when asked. 'I'd be like, “Are you saying I look like a Page 3 model?” And it was a really interesting experiment because they'd often be like, “No, no, you're way more classy than that.”'
Exploitation and lack of safeguarding
Hazell entered glamour modelling unexpectedly at 16 after leaving school and working in a hair salon. A colleague encouraged her to apply, and she sent photos to addresses given to her, including one for the Daily Star's 'beach babe' competition, which she won. She soon won the Sun's 'Page 3 idol' competition. 'I went from growing up there to owning a luxury apartment overlooking the Thames,' she said. 'I was so young, there was so much exploitation, I was not emotionally or mentally prepared for it.' Safeguarding, she noted, 'was basically nonexistent. There was so little protection for women entering that industry.'
Looking back, Hazell said Page 3 'was just a wild thing to grow up with … those images were so readily available in newspapers and in newsagents.' She recalls feeling 'numb' and drinking heavily to cope. 'A lot of the time I was just numb. I'd drink a lot and tell myself to enjoy the party.'
Therapy and the Ted Lasso connection
Therapy has helped her process the fallout from a sex tape sold to the Sunday Sport. Writing about it was 'terrifying' and like 'reliving it,' but she said 'the shame for me needed to be ridded.'
The Edinburgh fringe show begins in 2019 with her auditioning to play Keeley Jones, a character inspired by her, in Ted Lasso. She did not get the part but landed a recurring role and became a staff writer. Hazell is still writing the show, saying 'Right now I'm just staring at a laptop, ordering food and thinking, this is difficult.' She promises it will be funny: 'Trauma and humour are intertwined … even within the spiralling and the PTSD of it all, it should be a humorous retelling.'
Keeley Hazell: Everyone's Seen My Tits is at Pleasance Courtyard, Edinburgh, from 5 to 29 August.
