Lysette Anthony's Devastating Grief After Partner's Death
Lysette Anthony describes herself as 'broken' following the death of her partner, actor Marcus Gilbert. The 62-year-old actress reveals that some days she struggles to get out of bed, overwhelmed by grief after losing the man she shared a 'partnership of dreams' with for three years.
A Love Story Spanning Decades
Marcus Gilbert, best known for playing Rupert Campbell-Black in the first television adaptation of Jilly Cooper's Riders, died in January at age 67 after battling throat cancer that spread to his liver and bones. The couple's relationship had spanned more than thirty years, beginning with a brief affair on the set of A Ghost In Monte Carlo in 1990 before rekindling three years ago.
'I never remembered much about our affair on that film,' Marcus had told friends. 'But what I do remember is every single word I said to her on set when my character was marrying hers: 'I will love you and cherish you for the rest of my life.' I said it with great heart.'
Reconnection Amid Health Struggles
The couple reconnected after Marcus sent Lysette a 'very sweet letter' when he learned she had been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. Marcus himself was suffering from the same devastating neurological condition. Their first meeting after thirty years lasted from lunch until seven in the evening, with Lysette immediately calling her best friend afterward to say 'my life's changed.'
'This is the third act,' Marcus had declared. 'There's only one life. Let's go out with a bang.'
Tragic Final Separation
In a heartbreaking twist, Lysette was apart from Marcus when he died. Four weeks earlier, they had argued about his plans to spend a weekend with old family friends who had been close to his late wife, Homaa Khan-Gilbert, who died in 2020 after 28 years of marriage.
'I felt those friends never wanted me to really be part of his life,' Lysette explains. 'I'd asked him to make a choice and he chose them. That was the last time I saw him.'
When Marcus tried to call her a final time, she didn't answer. She only learned of his death when a mutual friend texted to commiserate.
Living With Illness and Loss
Both partners were battling serious health conditions throughout their relationship. Lysette suffers from Parkinson's disease that has tightened its cruel grip in the last year, requiring her to set alarms to take medication every three hours. Marcus had been diagnosed with throat cancer just weeks after they reconnected and underwent chemotherapy treatment.
Despite the challenges, Lysette remembers a 'truly joyous summer' when they rented accommodation near Guildford's Royal Surrey County Hospital where Marcus was being treated. 'He'd be straight out of the most horrendous treatment looking like he'd been to a bloody spa,' she recalls fondly. 'He was very stoic. The way he dealt with everything just took my breath away.'
Navigating Complex Family Dynamics
Lysette acknowledges the difficulty of entering Marcus's established world of longstanding friendships and family connections that predated their relationship by decades. 'Entering that world later in life was never going to be simple,' she admits. 'At times, I felt reduced to something far smaller than the adult reality of what we were.'
The situation became particularly painful around holidays, with Lysette spending Christmas 2024 alone after being 'disinvited' from celebrations with Marcus's family. 'I've never known loneliness like that,' she confesses.
Final Reflections and Unanswered Questions
Lysette continues to grapple with guilt and unanswered questions. 'I keep going back and back saying, 'Did I fail? Did I fail him?' Of course, I failed him. But did I? Whatever happened to us?'
She finds some solace in photographs from their time together, including images from their early affair in 1990 and happier moments from just last year. But one particular photograph haunts her - a montage from March showing a hearse passing in the background of what she believes was 'the last time we were really happy.'
'We could have had this amazing, amazing life,' Lysette reflects through tears. 'An amazing ending.' Instead, she faces the profound loneliness of loss while managing her Parkinson's symptoms, forever changed by a love story that spanned decades but ended in separation and grief.
