Gen Z: Time to re-download Hinge… Boomer: What happened to that nice bloke you were seeing last week? Got the ick. The what? The ick, for God's sake. Cosmopolitan describes it as a 'sudden turn-off that instantly kills attraction'. So what did he do? Forget your birthday? Lie about his whereabouts? Hang on, I bet he said he doesn't like the new Harry Styles album… For real, it's worse. I got Linkedick. Watch your language. It means I got the ick from his LinkedIn. He shared his promotion with the caption: 'Rise and grind! CEO mindset ' And that's bad? He got a promotion – surely that calls for champers? But sharing it online is such an ick. Fifty-five per cent of Gen Zs say regular LinkedIn posts are a massive turn off.
In my day, we judged men on whether they had a job, not whether they bragged about it. Linked-sin: constant posting is a Gen Z no-no. It's so cringe. I once dated a guy who had 'B2B SaaS superstar' in his bio. Major red flag. I don't know what half of those words mean. Anyway, what else besides having a job gives you this mysterious ick? According to a new Wisp survey, 34 per cent of Gen Zs are grossed out when someone replies to texts too quickly. So you want them to ignore you? Quick, tell my husband he's a Gen Z sex god. Laughing my a*s off. Then there are emojis. Imagine a man using unironically. *Shudders* I think that little moji is rather cute. It's e-moji. But it gets worse. In a TikTok with 3.1 million views, influencer Isabella Jansen asked users to share the 'ickiest icks you ever got from a man'.
Enlighten me… One girl said her date took her for dinner, then called his mum halfway through to ask for the money to pay. She'd be better off with your Linky-Dink bloke. At least he's got a job. Another dumped a guy because he showed up in flip-flops and said, 'Sorry kitty, my feet stink' to her cat. Poor hygiene does feel like legitimate grounds for rejection. Any others? As Cosmo says, a lot of icks are completely 'irrational'. Like wearing a backpack with both straps on. That's literally how you're supposed to wear a backpack. One strap only. Both straps is giving year-seven energy. But great posture! I'm getting the ick over your lack of common sense.
Then there's the Independent's list of universal icks, which includes: clapping when a plane lands, having long fingernails and breathing heavily. Breathing heavily? They'd prefer someone potentially dead? Also, a date can't wear bluetooth headphones, take selfies in the gym or call roast dinner 'scran'. Well, we had turn-offs in my day, too. Only ours actually made sense. Ah-help! Boomers are turned off by Alan Partridge. Let me guess… catching the plague and not being able to churn butter? How old do you think I am? Things like if a bloke had 'salesman energy'. Like he worked on the Tesco checkouts? It means he's all charm and no substance. Smarmy. We'd later say, 'There's something a bit Alan Partridge about him.' Who's Alan Partridge? Do you know Richard Madeley…? Oh, forget it. But I will admit I once got a bit grossed-out by a man owning his own fondue set.
See? You had standards, too! But if we got the ick in 1978, we pushed through because there were only three single men in the village. So depressing. It's commitment! You couldn't ghost someone because they'd ring the home phone and your dad would answer. Someone using a landline would give me the ick immediately. It gave everyone the ick! But we didn't have 47 other options on a dating app! Honestly, your constant exaggerating is a total ick. Fine by me. I survived the 70s, I'm a tough ch-ick.
