Mindy Meleyal, a counsellor at LGBT Foundation, has shared her story of coming out as a lesbian in 1981, after her mother warned she would be a 'very lonely woman'. Now 75, she has been with her partner Linda for over three decades.
Coming out in 1981
In 1981, at age 30, Mindy came out as a lesbian after ending a five-year marriage with a man. Her mother reacted with disbelief, saying, 'You're not a lesbian, if you were, I would know', and continued to pressure her to move past what she assumed was a phase.
Mindy had married her ex-husband in 1976, and they had been friends before getting together. The marriage was not easy, and they went through IVF while trying to have a baby, which ruptured their relationship. She thought she was heterosexual her entire life, but before marrying, she had told her ex-husband she would like to feel what being with a woman was like. They ignored it, and she never scratched that itch.
Meeting Linda
After leaving her husband, Mindy moved into a new world full of lesbians. She met Linda at a party, standing in the kitchen talking about music, and knew there was something between them. After finding out Linda was interested, she locked eyes with her outside a nightclub and said, 'I'm in the phone book, call me'.
They started dating in 1991 when Mindy had just turned 40. She introduced Linda to her mother, and they got on brilliantly. Her mother even said, 'I have to say, I've never seen you so happy'.
Life together
In 1994, Mindy and Linda moved to Manchester for Mindy's job. In the late 90s, Mindy started volunteering at what was then known as the Lesbian and Gay Foundation (now LGBT Foundation) and trained to become a therapist and couples counsellor.
In 2007, they had a civil partnership, with around 80 family and friends celebrating in a townhouse just outside Manchester. Mindy's mother attended the ceremony, despite starting to become ill, and flirted with some of their lesbian friends. She died in 2009, but Mindy is glad she got to see her happy.
Now, 35 years on, Mindy and Linda have a great relationship, staying committed to each other's happiness and care, with lots of cuddles. Mindy reflects, 'Looking back at what my mum said to me when I came out, I felt sad at first. But we grew from that moment, and became stronger. Now, I could not be happier and full of life.'
