A Shropshire farmer has described the moment he blew off much of his face with a shotgun in a suicide attempt, blaming mounting financial pressures and isolation. Brian, who asked for his surname to be withheld, attempted to take his own life in January last year after the sudden death of his first wife and fears that he would be forced to sell his farm.
Speaking from his brother's farm near Shrewsbury, Brian recalled the morning he nestled the barrel of the gun under his chin and pulled the trigger. The shot destroyed his lower jaw, teeth, mouth and nose, and took an inch off his tongue. After realising most of his face had gone, he staggered to the River Severn and threw himself in, but could not drown. His collie, Sam, found him hours later.
Brian's first wife died in June 1990 after a brief illness. The isolation of the farm deepened his depression. He also faced a £50,000 life insurance demand, a frozen bank overdraft, and the threat of prosecution under new pollution regulations requiring £55,000 of improvements. 'I was afraid of going bust and having to hold a farm sale,' he said.
Suicides among farmers are high in Shropshire, with 27 of 40 suicides in the county last year being farmers. Nationally, farmer suicides occur at a rate of roughly one per day, attributed to diminishing returns and increasing isolation. Brian's second wife, whom he married last October, lives separately due to work commitments.
After the suicide attempt, a neighbour found him in the kitchen. He was taken to a Shrewsbury hospital where three surgeons rebuilt his face in a nine-hour operation. Now, Brian says he feels glad to be alive but still unable to return to his own farm near Welshpool. 'I kept it all to myself – that's the country way,' he said.
