Introduction: The Art of Pass Notes
As the Guardian's Pass Notes series reaches its 5,000th entry, one of its regular writers reflects on the bizarre topics he's covered over the years. The column, known for its distinctive format, begins with 'Age' — a challenge when the subject is something like bees or God. Pass Notes originated in the short-lived Sunday Correspondent, was adopted by the Guardian's G2 section in 1992, scrapped in 2005, and resurrected in 2009. It remains a crib sheet for the modern world, offering just enough information on a given topic.
Tim Dowling's 10 Most Memorable Pass Notes
1. Six-Seven: The Slang That Took Over Classrooms
This explainer on the six-seven phenomenon became the most-read Pass Notes of all time. The phrase, originating from a Philadelphia rapper's track and popularized by NBA star LaMelo Ball, sparked a moral panic in schools. Teachers banned it, but some incorporated it into lessons. The hand gesture and accompanying meme slang baffled adults, but the craze was already fading by the time it was written about.
2. Donald Trump's Presidential Bid: As Ridiculous as His Hair
In 2015, Pass Notes failed to take Donald Trump seriously, accurately describing his hair as 'dead alien animal' and his promises, including a wall on the Mexican border. The column captured a time when mere description was sufficient ridicule.
3. Prince Andrew: A Royal Bounder
In 2003, Pass Notes exposed Prince Andrew for taking a royal jet to a golf tournament, costing taxpayers an estimated £10,000. The column noted his interests in golf, parties, and models, and highlighted the Royal and Ancient Golf Club's refusal to admit female members.
4. Fendi's £750 Vulva Scarf
In 2018, Fendi unveiled a shawl that looked like a giant vulva. The column debated whether it was a fashion statement or a mistake, noting the pink version was removed from the website while blue and red remained. The scarf made wearers look 'as if they're being born'.
5. Orange Pizza: Australia's Culinary Outrage
Bubba Pizza in Australia sparked online outrage by putting oranges on pizza, alongside smoked ham and mozzarella. The column compared it to pineapple on pizza, noting that even Sweden puts bananas on pizza and China tops pizzas with durian.
6. Sony's Smart Wig: Absurd Tech
In 2013, Sony patented a smart wig with features like bat-vision, wig-to-wig communication, and self-awareness. The column mocked the idea, wondering if mind-reading merkins were next. The smart wig never materialized.
7. Are Fitness Trackers Bad for Your Health?
In 2015, Pass Notes questioned the anxiety caused by fitness trackers, citing a BMJ article warning of diagnostic uncertainty. The column suggested throwing the device away or inventing an app that says 'Everything's OK'.
8. Naming Generation Z: The Founders
In 2015, Pass Notes incorrectly predicted 'The Founders' as the name for post-millennials, but gen Z was not among the options. The column mocked alternatives like Plurals, iGen, and Homeland Generation.
9. Ghosting: Modern Relationship Woes
In 2016, Pass Notes explored ghosting, noting 80% of millennials had experienced it. The column also mentioned positive ghosting, like leaving a party without saying goodbye, known as the Irish goodbye.
10. Blue Latte: The Vegan Coffee That Isn't Coffee
In 2016, a Melbourne café sold a blue latte with no coffee, made from blue algae, costing A$8. The column mocked its seaweed smell and sour milk taste, noting customers bought it for Instagram.
