In what many would consider an unlikely pairing, a gay man and a straight woman have built a life together that defies conventional labels, proving that love knows no boundaries. Samantha Wynn Greenstone, 38, and Jacob Martin Hoff, 32, are expecting their first child while maintaining what they describe as a deeply fulfilling monogamous marriage.
From Theatre Friends to Soulmates
Their extraordinary journey began nine years ago during auditions for a theatre production of Fiddler on the Roof. Jacob distinctly remembers hearing what he called an "insane cackle" from across the room at the end of a song. The laughter belonged to Samantha, who was auditioning for the role of the witch Fruma-Sarah.
"I just thought, 'whoever just made that noise doesn't give a f*** what anyone thinks about them'," Jacob recalled to the Daily Mail. He boldly approached Samantha and told her, "if they don't give you that part they're crazy".
Both were cast in the production, and by opening night, they had become inseparable friends. For eighteen months, they maintained what Jacob describes as a "platonic best friendship", spending late nights together and enjoying each other's company without romantic expectations.
The Turning Point
The dynamic between them shifted when Samantha began developing deeper feelings. Confused by her emotions toward her gay best friend, she consulted an energy healer in San Diego, where she was living at the time. The healer told Samantha that she and Jacob shared "a spiritual umbilical cord".
"Someone had found the words to explain our connection and package it in a way that made me finally understand what we had between us," Samantha explained. Emboldened by this revelation, she texted Jacob that night to ask if he felt anything beyond friendship for her.
To her surprise and delight, Jacob confirmed that he shared her feelings. A week later, after watching Samantha perform in a play called Animal Crackers, they spent the night together at a friend's house, sharing a bed. The next day, they officially became a couple.
Navigating Challenges and Criticism
Despite facing scepticism from some quarters of the LGBTQ+ community, who have accused Jacob of "bi-erasure", the couple remains steadfast in their relationship. Jacob insists he isn't bisexual and finds the label offensive when applied to him against his self-identification.
"I feel fully satisfied in our relationship and being able to verbalise and share my feelings with the world gives me the peace and comfort to feel completely myself in this relationship," Jacob stated. "She is my soulmate."
The couple documents their "mixed orientation marriage" on social media, where they occasionally face trolling from critics. However, they've also received messages from people in similar relationships who feel encouraged by their story.
"We often get messages from people in similar relationships or people who say their parents or even grandparents were in a mixed-orientation relationship," said Jacob. "It's really helped us feel that there is a community out there that is waiting to break through the surface."
Building a Life Together
Their relationship milestones followed a traditional path, albeit within their unique circumstances. When the theatre production closed three weeks after they became a couple, Samantha moved to Los Angeles to live with Jacob. In 2018, they relocated to Beverly Hills.
In December 2023, Jacob proposed to Samantha on the red carpet at the entrance to the Beverly Hills Hotel, following a meal at Sugarfish sushi restaurant. The hotel was decorated with Christmas decorations, creating what Jacob described as the perfect romantic setting.
They celebrated their engagement with champagne and chocolate soufflé at the Polo Lounge, where the pianist played a Fiddler on the Roof medley in honour of where they first met.
In November 2024, they married at the Kabbalah Center in Boca Raton, Florida, in a traditional Jewish ceremony before 34 guests, followed by an intimate reception at a hotel.
Regarding their physical relationship, the couple confirms they conceived their child "the old fashioned way". "Yes, we did it the old fashioned, 'birds and the bees' way," Jacob revealed. Samantha added, "I would say we made love and it was lovely. We make love because we are in love."
Both families have been fully accepting of their relationship, including Jacob's "very conservative Christian" father, who is reportedly "thrilled" about their marriage and impending parenthood.
Despite the unconventional nature of their relationship, Samantha feels "completely secure" in her marriage and never questions Jacob's love or attraction toward her. "Time and experiencing the way Jacob has shown up for me and our family in this relationship has completely ironed over any anxieties I once felt," she said.
The couple acknowledges that their story might inspire others but cautions against pursuing similar relationships without the deep connection they share. "We try to really pump on the brakes with these people and explain to them that a soulmate connection is much different than a crush," Samantha noted.
To their detractors, the couple has a simple message: "Just keep watching us and you will see we are a normal loving couple."
